𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤-𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤 ! ( 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐄 )

is this what i wanted? maybe.

chapter two -

1am
october fourteenth , 2021

{dear diary ; is this what i wanted? him? do i want him? maybe. maybe i do. but for how long?}

・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

" i watched you through your window
i was wearing that dumb sweatshirt
i looked like a goon, i was dressed for winter
even though it was the middle of June
i watched you get undressed
i must have turned bright red
'cause I couldn't stand to face you
'cause I liked what I saw
and maybe we should just be friends
tell me how you feel about me
do you like or like, like me?
tell me what you really feel
do you like me? just say you do "

・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

"is this what you wanted?"
finn whispered, leaning in closer to the girl in his arms, who seemed to be breathing heavily beneath him on the cold autumn afternoon.

"i didn't say what i wanted."
millie pulled him closer to her chest, clawing his back as she pressed him onto her dainty figure.

"it's obvious what- or should i say- who- you wanted, babygirl."
he grasped onto the girl tighter than she thought anyone could.

"obvious?"
millie purred, trailing soft kisses down his chest.

"obvious."

・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

after everything was said and done, and the pair began to slip into the familiar , comfortable silence that the chilling October weather offered, time seemed to stop.

millie pulled herself up , struggling to slip out from underneath the body of the mystery boy.

"ah. so she wakes."
he whispered, sitting up onto the surface of the mattress, with sheets sprawled everywhere.

"yes, yes she does."
the girl sat up as well, scooting her body closer to him as she huddled underneath the cold blanket at the foot of the mattress.

"thank you, by the way."
the curly haired student stared into the wall, muttering the few words into the silence of the night.

"for what? it was a double sided thing. we both won. now it's done."
millie snuggled up against him, to feel the warmth of another human body.

"i guess."
he wrapped one arm around her, both of them getting gooose bumps from the contact of cold skin.

the two sat in complete silence, crickets chirping faintly in the distance, but they were too distracted to notice.

millie didn't know what she felt.

finn didn't know what he felt.

they both didn't know what they felt.

here they were, breathing the same air, without a single damn clue who the other was.

here they were, surrendering themselves to a complete stranger, who has now seen them more raw and bare than any living soul before.

millie got what she wanted.

finn got what he wanted.

but why do they feel as empty as they do?

—