Thoughts & Things

hurting again

"She's nothing to me. She's just a friend," he said. She trusted him. She thought she knew the man who was standing there.. telling her he cheated on her. Everything she knew about him was all but a facade. Yes, no one is perfect but would someone who actually cared and gave a damn hurt you in the sickest and twisted way? Would they be selfish enough to forget about you and everything you were working on?

People often say that everyone has to go through life and experience pain as well as face it head-on. Yet, this pain, it's more than she could ever handle in a million lifetimes. She cried again for what seemed like the 100th time this night. He called her again to explain how sorry he was for everything. How he should've never done it. But what's been done has been done. Everything he says means nothing to her. She feels her world collapsing and there's nothing she can do. She can't even hold onto something because everything has been a lie. Since the moment she laid eyes on him, till now. Lie after lie.

Finally caving she answers the cheater, the lier. He was crying. Crying for what? For fucking another girl? For flirting with more girls she can count? For telling her that someone was "just a friend" when in reality it seemed like she was more than a friend? "Right, you're sorry. Sorry for putting me through Hell and back." She screamed at her phone. She sat in her bed crying and screaming while looking at a picture of him on her desk. She laughs. "Everyone was right. You were too good to be true. You just needed someone to fuck constantly and put up with your bullshit." She sighed.

She hangs up and slams the cursed phone to the wall. She didn't even want to touch anything he ever touched. Instead of being sad, now she was mad. She was fueled with so much that she could see red all around. After everything she did. After giving him all he could possibly need.. this is what she gets in return. This sick and twisted game he played with her would wound her trust more than anything. She just wished it was all a dream... a nightmare to be honest. Then she could wake up from it and not have to relive everything over and over again.

"How can I love someone after this?" she whispers to herself. "How can I love myself after this?" was the more important question she asked. No one deserves this pain. In the end, she'll cry until finally one day, she'll realize her worth. She'll realize she's better off without him. Without all the bullshit. Maybe, just maybe in the near future, she'll fall in love again. Next time it won't be with someone plays with her heart. It will be with someone who will put it back in place and care for it more than anything in the world. She'll be okay but for now, she'll hurt until then.

Authors Note: Hey there! 

Many of my friends have gone through this and I wanted to try writing something that isn't so lovey-dovey. I'm a hopeless romantic and I know I see the good in everyone so I wanted to try seeing the bad. If that makes any sense. I hope you enjoyed it. If you have ever been cheated on or lied to, things get better. It sucks but know your worth. All my friends are goddesses and I always tell them that they'll be okay. After this pain, they'll find some who will treat them the way they deserve to be treated. Take care loves! :)