IS IT OKAY IF I CALL YOU MINE

Part Four

"Is it okay if I call you mine?

Just for a time

And I will be just fine

If I know that you know that I'm

Wanting, needing your love Oh

If I ask of you is it alright

If I ask you to hold me tight

Through a cold dark night

'Cause there may be a cloudy day in sight

And I need to let you know that I might

Be needing 'your love oh."

'Di ko namalayang unti-unti na palang bumagsak ang mga luha sa mata ko habang matamang nakikinig sa malamyos na tinig ni Renzo.

He just reminded me so much of Kenzo. Akala ko, tuluyan na akong nakalaya mula sa nakaraan, pero heto ako ngayon, muling binabalikan ang mga alaala noong mga panahong kapiling ko pa si Kenzo.

"Best, why are you crying, is there something wrong?" nag-aalala niyang tanong sa akin.

"Wala, napuwing lang ako. Tuloy mo na 'yong pagkanta," wika ko habang marahang pinapahid ang mumunting butil ng luhang bumalong sa aking mga mata.

"And what I'm trying to say isn't new

It's just the thing that happen to me

When I'm reminded of you"

"Hi Chasze," I am about to enter our room when suddenly Kenzo appear in front of me. And like what he always did, he just ruin my day, every now and then and he was successful in it. At in the end, I always find myself scolding after him, but he always give a sweet smile in return.

"Will you please get lost." And I gave him a death glare, telling him that he must stay away from me.

"Wait, can you please lend me a tissue if you have some, because my nose is bleeding so hard." Then he gave me a mischievous smile.

When will be the time that he's gonna stop smiling back at me ,whenever I gave him a death glare. I'm just wondering what he had always eaten everyday to have such kind of spirit that almost kills me to death.

"I don't have tissue, but I do have a bandage with me that I'm going to use when I broke your legs." Yeah I am serious about that; I'm going to break his legs once that my temper got exploded over him.

"You're not serious about that thing, Am I right?" 

I think this is a victory, I just saw how he turns so pale when he had heard me telling that. "I'm dead serious; I never give a damn joke so, you better step backward or I do break your legs either?"

"That's too harsh,"

"Then choose: stay away from me, or I am gonna break your legs?" I said seriously while looking straight into his deep brown eyes.

Wait, it is true I saw some pain in his eyes.

This can't be happening, grrr! I do really hate this kind of feeling, isn't it weird? Never in my life that I cared about others, yes I'm a self-centered person. I do speak a little, but with him grr! I am a little bit talkative now. What was with him, I do even find myself speaking the language that I am always afraid of using.

"Like when I hear your name,

Or see a place that you've been

Or see a picture of your grin

Or pass a house that you've been in

At one time or another"

I wiped my tears so hard; my memory always played with me whenever I wanted to forget everything about my past. Yeah I know it isn't fair with him, but that memory is killing me so hard whenever it flashes into my mind. If I only have a time machine with me, I will never let the future be close to me, all I wanted is to stay from my past when I met Kenzo and became part of my life.

"Umiiyak ka na naman best, sorry if I didn't give justice to this song,"

"You don't need to say sorry. I am a little bit emotional whenever I heard that song." I tried to wear a fake smile on my face and mange not to cry so hard in front of him.

"Sige, iba na lang ang kakantahin ko sa 'yo." Then he wave his hands up somewhat like there is wonderful idea that comes into his mind.

"Kung tayo'y matanda na

Sana'y 'di tayo magbago

Kailanman, nasaan man ito ang pangako ko

Makuha mo pa kayang ako'y halkan at yakapin oh..

Hanggang sa pagtanda natin

Nagtatanong lang sa'yo ako pa kaya'y iibigin mo kahit maputi na ang buhok ko."

No doubt, he's really a good singer somewhat like Kenzo, yeah he reminds me so much of him, maybe that's the reason why I can't move forward that easily.

Renzo happen to be my bestfriend during elementary grades, I remember the time when we first met he just save me from my bully classmates that day. From that moment, he became my savoir, though I do really know that he's the one who needed so much help from me. Renzo was so weak, because of his illness he had heart disease that cause him to look so pale and vulnerable but he always manage to look so strong and brave enough in front of me.

"Best, naalala mo 'yong panahon na kailangan naming umalis nila Mama para lumuwas ng Maynila to have my operation," I stop for a while and look directly into his eyes.

"'Di ba, sabi ko noon, once the operation got succeeded, babalik agad ako sa lugar kung saang nangako akong babalikan ko ang best friend ko. Alam mo ba, sobra akong natakot para sa'yo kasi wala na ko para ipagtanggol ka." He stop for a while and take a deep breath.

"Yeah I do remember that day, and your promises also."

"Will you please stop talking to me in English, gosh best, you're making my nose bleed." And he's acting somewhat rubbing his nose so hard trying to get that blood rid from it, as if there were some.

Yeah, bakit nga ba ako napapa-English, gosh I don't think if I do have enough blood in my body to get my organs functions well or to I need to undergo a blood transfusion now? Maybe I am a little bit carried away by scenes that flash into my mind.