Good Morning

Good Morning 12/31/19

December 31, 2019

Good morning.

2019 sucked from start to finish.
I shaved my head Twice this year.
That's two separate mental breakdowns.
Went back to the psych ward twice, for two more mental breaks.
Dealt with a shitton of misgendering and transphobia, not just from strangers but from friends and coworkers.
My girlfriend broke up with me because she's a lesbian and I'm not a girl (fair enough but ouch).
My physical health has been on a rapid decline, and a new ailment has shown its ugly head in the form of excruciating facial pain.
I made wonderful new friends who no longer speak to me.
Gender confusion. A Lot of gender confusion.
An old friend stood me up.
A new job made life nine thousand times harder physically and brought on new levels of emotional and mental strain the likes of which I have never experienced before.
A car accident made life all the more fun with more neck and back pain than I could really handle on top of everything else.
The landlord decided to sell our house out from under us.
And then the worst day of my life happened.
"The worst day of my life" has been a lot of different days. Most recently, the worst day of my life happened in the span of three days.
I was kicked out of my apartment by the roommates I considered family.
I spent the night crying in the arms of a friend I had just met.
I spent the next night in a homeless shelter.
And finally, after a long bout of delays, I spent the next night one state over in my parent's house. The place I just got done swearing to everyone I would never go back to.

I don't regret the time spent in Virginia, or the people I met there, the experiences I had, good and bad. They have made me the person I am today, and despite a lot of shit that just plain sucks and has no discernible purpose, I like the person I am now. I don't like the things I have to deal with or the way I have to deal with them, but those things don't define me.

Here's to next year, and treating her like the queen she's going to be.

Final Thoughts:
Tomorrow is not only a new day, but a new year.