Stolen Virtue

Sunshine smile

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Chapter 18

We’ve had her home for two weeks now and still no change. She keeps herself locked up in her room only ever leaving if she had to. It killed me. I hated having to watch her suffer and not being able to help her. She acted like she didn’t know who I was. I couldn’t even hold her to comfort her, because she screamed whenever I tried to get close.

I was awake in one of the guest rooms in her house. I hadn’t left since she was released from the hospital. Her mother tried to get me to go home, but I refused to be away from her. I jumped out of bed and rushed into her room, when I heard her screaming. The nightmares were getting worse. Her screams were louder and more terrifying.

I found her sitting on her bed, clutching the bed cover. Scared out of her mind. The house was empty, except for me. Her father was back, with his wife, Jenny was staying with a friend and her Mom needed a night out. So I offered to keep an eye on her on till she returned.

She didn’t want to leave, knowing that Dillon was still out there. I assured her that Juliet will be safe with me. I’d die before I let anyone take her again.

I entered her room with caution. Her eyes locked on me and she started to shake. I held up my hand in surrender, letting her know that she was safe that I’d never hurt her. She started to back up against the headboard of her bed.

“No, no, please, please. I don’t want to anymore, it hurts so much and I’m tried Dillon, I’m so tired. Please don’t hurt me anymore.”

Those were the first words she’s spoken in weeks and they broke my heart. She thought I was Dillon. To hear her plead for him to not hurt her anymore, made me wanna kill him. I stepped a little closer to her.

“Jewels, it’s ok. I’m not gonna hurt, I’d never hurt you. It’s me Baby. It’s Clyde, not Dillon. Dillon’s gone baby, he can’t hurt you anymore. I made sure of it.” She sat there and stared at me for a while, her brow knitted in confusion.

“Clyde?”

I nodded my head, relief. “Yes baby, it’s me.” I proceeded towards her, but she shook her head.

“No, stay there. Y-you can’t come any closer. I-I’m not c-clean.” I looked at her in confusion.

“What are you talking about Juliet?” I didn’t care if she wasn’t clean, I just wanted to hold her. She looked at herself then looked me, willing me to see whatever it was that she was seeing.

“What is it Baby, what do you want me to see?” I asked her, as I slowly inched forward.

“Me,” she said pulling at her clothes, “I’m dirty, Clyde. I-I can feel him Clyde. I can feel him on t-top of me, inside of me, running through m-my vain. He’s in my head and I can’t get him out. I can feel him every second of every day and no matter how hard I try I can’t get him out. He makes me feel dirty, so dirty.”

She pulled at her clothes as she spoke.  

My heart break watching her and my anger built. “He told me things Clyde, horrible things. He killed those girls, he drugged us and Amy… S-she helped him. She took me there and left me to him. Why would she do that Clyde, why?”

I took a step back, Shocked. Amy? No! “Amy took you to him?”

She didn’t answer, just continued talking. “He said I was nothing, just a lifeless toy for him to play with. He made me do things and he did things to me, dirty, painful, nasty things. He said when he was done with me no one would want me. No one would love me.”

I was sitting on the bed. I grabbed her hands and slowly pulled her into my arms. I never felt so completed in my life. Having her there in my arms, never felt more right. She rested her head on my chest and continued talking.

“He made me listen to you, every time you were there. And you were with her, Amy. He said that you’d never find me that you weren’t looking hard enough. Why didn’t you find me?”

She started pounding on my chest and I let her. “Why didn’t you find me!? Why did you take so long!? Why did you let him take me!? Why, Clyde, why!?”

I felt the hot tears fell from my eyes, as I apologised, “I’m sorry Juliet, I’m so sorry he hurt you.”

I held her until she was all cried out. With her head still resting on my chest she said.

“I have to go now.” I stroke her hair. “What are you talking about baby, where do you have to go?”

She moved to look up at me. “Away, she will take care of me. I don’t like feeling pain, it hurts too much. She makes the pain go away, so I have to go.”

I looked at her confused. “Where do you have to go baby, and who’s she?” She looked at me like she didn’t understand why I wasn’t getting it. “The other Juliet. She will take care of me like before and I won’t have to feel any pain.”

I was startled, she wanted to go back into herself to hide away from the world again. I pulled her back to me, holding her close. “No, I don’t want you to go. Please stay with me Juliet.”

I pleaded, my voice shaking as I speak. She shook her head. “But I don’t want to.”

“Please, don’t leave me here alone by myself. I need you Juliet, I can’t do this without you by my side. Please stay.”

She nodded head against my chest. “Maybe for a little while.”

I pulled her to lie with me, covering us both with the covers. I put my hand flat on her stomach and caressed it.

“Please don’t kill our baby Juliet.” She didn’t reply, so I continued. “I’ve been thinking about it. It’ll have your dark curls, my green eyes and your smile, definitely your sunshine smile. If it’s a girl, we can call her Claudia. And if it’s a boy, we can call him Julian.”

She shifted in my arms. “I like Claudia.” I sighed with relief. It was a slow start, but it was a start nonetheless. I’ll accept anything.