Alcoholism

Chapter One Addiction

'This was never easy. I don't know how i came to be this low.' As I took another sip of my cold bottle of liquor. I felt it rush down my throat. I became numb. Filled with warmth. Almost love. Yet as my tender fingers grasped the bottle tighter. I could feel myself drifting off into a daze. My eyes became hazey and my body began to droop. I started laughing out loud. "Oh what a joy it is!" I said loudly as I stomped inside my lab. I set the bottle down on my lab table. I whispered to myself. "They all think they're so clever. They think they can get rid of me?" Thoughts of past nights drifted in and out of my mind. "Fuck!" I screamed. And pushed everything off of my table violently. Paper, pencils, cylinders, alcohol. I grasped my hands on my head. They twitched violently as I slumped deeper into a drunken daze.

'The dreams. The nightmares. How did I become this way?' I thought. 'Why was I the one they always took advantage of? The one they looked down on. Criticized.' A few warm tears well up in my eyes. I ripped off my mask with haste and slammed it against the table. I bit down on my lip as I sit here. In the dim lightning, knowing what they were all doing. They were having the time of there lives. They didn't need me here.

Memories flashed. I got up. The pain came back. I bent over to grab my bottle. I fell to the floor. "Dammit." I said as I scraped myself against the cold concrete floor. I sat up with my bottle of liquor. Or what was left of it. "I'm useless to them." I said aloud. I cried. "I know what I should have done. And I can never take it back." I curled up in a ball on the floor. Letting the liquor flow out the bottle on to the floor. I heard a voice as I cried softly. "Yo D. Where you at, brah?" It was Mikey. He must have had too much to drink. I wiped my tears slowly and sat up and quickly as I could. "Down here." I called to him. As he attempted to walk towards me. He mumbled under his alcoholic breath. "Tonight. We party." I was to buzzed and depressed to escape his tight and drunken grasp of my wrist. So I let him take me. Out into the woods. With all of my brothers.