LA VENDETTA 2 - A HEARTWARMING CHRISTMAS STORY

LA VENDETTA 1

The guy's name is Gentile - we call him Mr. Gentile, cuz we're kind of polite kids. It was my first real lesson in dealing with an adult bullshit artist. He's known as a family man, a good Catholic, a real PILLAR of the community type of guy, y'know? He has this nice house in Roselle, NJ - on the street where me and my cousins and some of the neighborhood kids play stickball.
It's the summer of 1976, I'm 16, and, all of a sudden, I'm 'big' now from weightlifting, boxing and exercise. So Gentile sees this as perfect chance to exploit me. Tells me he's putting up a new Fabco Shoe store in Hoboken, NJ, and if I clean out and dismantle the old store that was there, he'll pay me BIG! And gimme a job after school when it was finished.
Now, Gentile has these delusions he's like Sonny from 'A Bronx Tale'. Yeah. Got the pinky ring, wears WAY too much Aqua Velva, and Vitalis in his hair. His hair is kinda, like, crunchy with that fixed wave up front. He always chews Trident gum. The gold chains. the works. In reality, he's just a short, pudgy guy with an overactive imagination. He drives me to Hoboken every morning in his Cadillac, regaling me with stories of grandeur. I slave away day after nasty day, in these incredibly brutal conditions - a musty, dusty building with not even a fuckin' FAN to relieve the relentless summer humidity. Probably saved him thousands from not having to hire a union crew. Then,
check this out - on the day the store opens - he unceremoniously FIRES me! And he's real cavalier about it, too! Like, just TOTALLY dismisses me. WTF?!
PLAYED. This guy clowned me, man. At first, I'm confused - then SUPREMELY pissed. Alright, man, just wait, I got something for you. Finally, I see the perfect opportunity. It's right before Halloween, Gentile has these two big Jack o' Lanterns on his front steps, with the candles burning inside them so they're lit up in the dark. It's all very lovely. Me and my cousin Skinny sneak over there at night with a bunch of firecrackers we have left over from the 4th of July. Skinny delays the fuses, throws 'em in the jack o' lanterns, we ring the doorbell, and bolt across the street - cracking up like hyenas - and hiding behind the bushes.
Gentile opens the door, sees nobody is there and starts making these threats into the night air. Like he's a real tough guy. All of a sudden, the firecrackers begin going off - BANG! BANG! BANG! Gentile is jumping around - like - he's being shot at. He thinks it's, like, a fuckin' MOB hit, or something. Hahahahaha! Me and Skinny are DYIN', man. Skinny laughs like a crow, like Heckle and Jeckle, you know - that's just his natural laugh - which only serves to further infuriate Gentile.
Then the pumpkins suddenly EXPLODE - and the insides splatter all over Gentiles head - his face - and glasses. He's shaking his fist, cursing, but he can't see a fuckin' thing - cuz it's pitch dark - AND he has pumpkin shit all over his face and glasses. Hahahaha!
Revenge is SWEET, man.