Hey Ava.

Letter 2

Hey Ava.

I've decided that I've had enough.

I'm going to run away, as far as I can go. As soon as I graduate- I'm outta here. It's stupid for me to stay when I'm obviously wanted. I'll be doing my parents a favour, since neither want me.

My backpack is under my bed, packed with long-life food, a couple of sets of clothes, my mp3 player and my credit card.

The only reason that I even had a credit card was because my parents were sick of me asking for money, even though I never asked for much. They don't care what I do with it, just like they don't care about what I do to myself.

I admit it, I've been cutting. More often now.

I just hate feeling worthless, like a monster. This seems like the only way out. Maybe one day it'll get better. But I don't think so.

Because life is not a fairy tale. It never ends happily.

In two days, I graduate.

In two days, I will be on a plane to New Zealand.

In two days, I will leave behind everyone that I know, good and bad, and leave behind memories.

I need to start fresh. So I picked a place no one would ever think of going, to stop them from looking for me.

Ava, you know that I love you, right? You were the best friend I've ever had. It's nothing that you did, don't worry. I just feel like no one can help me now, but I know that you're doing your best to try.

Perhaps I am stupid, trying to escape like this. But it is true that we learn best from mistakes, and I'm still learning from the mistakes that I've already made. What's life without a few bumps? It is to be expected. It's just that right now, my life feels like all the bumps are coming at once. And I don't think I have the strength to take them all.

I'll make myself a new life, one that I can be satisfied with. I'll get some real friends this time.

...yeah right.

This all feels so surreal. The fact that I'm leaving high school, leaving my family and leaving my country- all in two days?

I know that I won't regret this.

Because frankly; anything would be better than my current hellhole of a life.

You are the only bright thing in my world Ava.

Thanks for being there for me, I won't forget you.

Isabella Shaw