Dont Fade Away

Almost

Devans pov

"GET IN THE FUCKING SHOWER" he screamed. I quickly took off my robe and jumped in the cold flow of water. I stared at the wall and banged my head several times against the tiles. I fucked up. What was I thinking? I'm fucking worthless. A door slammed and my head whipped towards the sound to see a smirking man looking at me. Razor. Razor. Razor. Razor. I looked towards my arms and blood was flowing out of my wrists already. I looked towards the wall the see him walking closer to me.

PLEASE GOD DONT LET ME GO THIS WAY. My eyes blurred with tears as I looked to see a knife stuck in my chest. I fell to the concrete and watched him place some things around the room to make it look like a suicide. Guess the scars would help his situation. My vision blurred again but this time with an infinite sleep. I let him get me. I let Ben kill me. Why am I so stupid...

"DEVAN WAKE THE FUCK UP NOW" i jumped up out of bed instantly, beads of sweat around my forehead and tears already flowing down my cheeks. I looked and saw Ashton sitting next to me a worried expression etched in his features. He pulled me into a hug. Breathing in his scent to try to gain sanity again is a struggle when you can barely catch your breath.

He pulled back and took my face between his hands, "do you wanna talk about it?" He sounded concerned huh. I can't let him get to me that easily not after what happened.

He kept staring into my eyes searching for an answer. "Wherever your sanity stands, there will always be a fight against it. Whether it's against a stranger or yourself is all up to you. But the question is which is more dangerous? " He looked at me confused.

"No. No I don't want to talk about it." I said dismissing him.

"Okay well breakfast is in the kitchen. You kinda stumbled in here last night so I just took the couch." He stated rubbing the back of his neck. "Umm I'll be watching tv if you need me." With that he walked out.

I shook the nightmare out of my head and decided to get something to eat. My hair was a mess so I just put it in a bun. The tile in the hallway was really cold so I ran all the way to the kitchen. "What are you doing?" Ashton laughed.

"The floors cold" duh he should know this he lives here. Dipshit.

He just stared at me smiling.
"Don't judge me I can feel your judging from across the room" I defended and stuck my tongue out. I whipped around towards the counter to see pancakes, bacon, French toast, donuts, eggs, potatoes, and cereal staring right back at me. Yummmmm I'm fucking starving!!!
"I am soooo ready for this. WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOUR PLATES ASHTON?!"

"The cabinet above you" he simply stated. I looked up. Oh. I went on my tip toes to reach the plates but I couldn't quite get to them. I heard feet pad across the kitchen towards me until I felt a figure standing directly behind me. I saw his arm reach up to the plates and grab the first one. It was really hard to concentrate with his bare torso pressed to my back and his front firmly against me. Well fuck. He stood there for a little while and then set the plate down in front of me.

"There you go" he whispered in my ear and grabbed my waist. Shit. My breathing started getting a little heavier and at that point he just laughed a little and walked out of the kitchen. I turned around just in time to see him leave the room. As soon as he did i grabbed my chest and started breathing heavier. Woah. Stop Devan. Stop being dirty and eat your god damn food. I should've brought some holy water for myself, damn.

I stuffed my plate with 2 pancakes, 3 sausages, a donut, an a bunchhh of bacon. I'm a girl... But I don't eat like one. I searched around his kitchen to find the drawer with silver ware in it. He has a lot of random drawers. He can't fill all these if he's just here by himself. Him here by himself really works for me cause no one can here us when he fucks the shit out of me... EAT YOUR FOOD DEVAN FUCK UGH STOP THINKING OF THE DIRTY. PURE. I brought my plate and walked into the living room we were in just last night. There were shot glasses, beer bottles, an overwhelming amount of liquor on the table, and movies spread all over the floor. No wonder I can't remember anything. I laughed and shook my head. The couch was filled with a still sleeping Madi so I slapped her legs and threw them onto the floor. All with one hand. Impressive Devan. Hmm. She made a noise that sounded like a demon was just awoken from the depths of hell, which is actually extremely accurate to her.

My plate was grabbed from my hand when I grabbed the remote. I looked to my right and there was Ashton wide awake, eating my fucking bacon. Madi's mouth dropped and looked at Ashton. He stopped and made eye contact with me and then with Madi.
"What?" He said hesitantly.

My face kept the stern stare directly at him. He looked scared. Good he should be that little shit.
"You never, ever mess with Devan and her bacon." Madi said like she read it out of a history book.

"Better run, Irwin"

He looked absolutely terrified. The plate was set on the table and he was already half way out of the room. Funny. I'll give him a 3 second head start. Madi counted to 3 out loud and I was out of the room and down the hall instantly. I sprinted up the stairs and into the game room which was again filled with liquor and a smell that definitely showed we partied. I saw him barely dodge into the bathroom by PAC-MAN. I sprinted in that direction and ran into him directly. He was facing me with a smug grin on his face.

Next thing I know I was pushed up against the wall. His hands holding my wrists against the green wallpaper, not able to move.
"You're fast Thompson. But no ones faster than me." He smiled and leaned in, eyes beginning to close. I thought for a second and formed my plan. I crouched under his arm, able to release my wrists from his firm grasp. Running out of the room and down the stairs, my plan was in action. I passed the living room "bye madi nice knowing you!!" I screamed. I sprinted out of the apartment, down the stairs (elevators are for pussies), and to the pool area. I stopped catching my breath when I reached the concrete. I looked back and there was Ashton laughing mockingly. " like I said. No one." My plan failed miserably. He was walking towards me. I backed up to where I was right at the edge of the pool. He smile even bigger, hands already up ready to push me in, and that's when I made the fastest decision I ever made in my life. I grabbed his wrists, turned around and pushed him in. A big splash was heard and I was on the ground laughing so hard I was crying.

He came above the water gasping and flailing his arms. "I CANT SWIM" he screamed. Shit. I put my hand out for him to grab.
"Ashton grab my hand!"
Panic written all over his face he grabbed me and stopped. I'm confused. He smirked and pulled me in with him.
I should've known he was up to something!! Of course he can swim ugh.
I was underwater not coming up because 1.) I wanted to scare him and 2.) his butt looked good from my point of view.
I looked up and saw him starting to get worried. Lines of concern etched in his forehead he dove underwater and grabbed me, bringing me back up to the surface. He kept his arm around my waist swimming to the stairs of the pool and setting me down. He wiped the hair out of my face to see me smiling.
"You may be fast, but I'll always win." I said lightly. My hands came up and rested chest while his arms we're holding my head. He looked from my eyes to my lips and back to my eyes until he started to lean in. I followed and
"DEVAN MARIE THOMPSON. NO PDA IN THE POOL." Madi screamed from the door. Ashton jumped back like he just got in trouble by my mom but I stayed frozen with my eyes shut. My hands fell down I'm disappointment and I shook my head laughing. Oh Madi you little shit.