Dragon Age One Shots

Confessions (Cullen)

Thought to have something a little different for the infamous kiss scene! Since my Trevelyan was a templar before the conclave (and friends with Cullen, too), I just wanted to build a little on the whole templar scenario somehow.

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With a sigh, the Commander of the Inquisition ran a hand down his face as he closed his office door. It had barely been a fortnight since Haven fell and already Elswyth was back to work, Crestwood was her first port to call, trying to figure out what was going on with the Wardens.

She returned an hour ago and he was given the last of the reports - a missing mayor, a dragon, and a tragic story.  A lot had happened - everyone was still processing the events when they got back to work. She checked up on everyone before she left, intent on trying her best to help everyone get back on their feet.

When she spoke to him last, it reminded him of her return to Kirkwall - she was exhausted when she got off the boat, but still, she worked, and still, she took the time to make sure he was okay. Only, this time, she had taken his hand, uncaring about the bustle of the day. 

She had only taken his hand once before: when he was leaving Kirkwall.

"Cullen, wait." 

He spun on his heel, surprised to hear her call out to him so soon after they bid each other farewell, and then she reached out and took his hand. Tight. Like she was afraid without knowing.

She looked at him, tired and restless, eyes flickering like she didn't know where to look, before fully looking into his eyes. The low sun illuminated her irises - bright blue with flecks of green. He always enjoyed how her eyes shone in the light, yet he didn't quite realise how much until then. They calmed him, helped him sleep when the nightmares were bad. She knew of them from a time they were hunting down a Maleficar together. Her eyes were usually what he would see when he awoke.

Elswyth was quiet, but her eyes said it all. She opened her mouth to talk yet no words came. Cullen knew the words she wanted to say and yet she said them after a moment: "I'll miss you, you know."

He didn't know if it was the words or how casually she spoke them that hurt the most - especially since it was clear to him it hurt to say them. He'd miss her greatly, even knowing she'd be at the Conclave with the Ostwick mages and Templars, neutral to the rebellion. 
"I'll be fine."

"You always are." And then she squeezed his hand before letting go. "Depending on how the conclave goes, if you're recruiting... I'll happily join the cause."

He arched a brow. "You will?"

"Someone's got to make sure you're taking care of yourself."

She was so close to him and he missed the warmth of her palm. He wanted to take her hand, comfort her as best he could, hold her if she would allow it. He wanted to kiss her then, so desperate to tell her how he felt his words failed him. 

He vowed he wouldn't love - yet another defensive wall.

Yet the warmth of her lips against his cheek was unforgettable. It tormented him.

It always haunted him.

"Cullen," He straightened from where he stood behind his desk and looked up with brief confusion as the door opened and closed. Elswyth - Lady Trevelyan, he corrected himself - had walked in, shivering from the cold. Since the events at Haven, she had fallen victim to shivering more regularly. From his time knowing her, Culled knew she wasn't too fond of freezing temperatures - a sensitivity caused by a few Maleficarum that used nothing but ice spells. She had been chasing them for a year and it was what made her a Knight-Captain. Since she returned to them after Haven, she was more vulnerable. She constantly said she'd be alright after a while once she had gotten used to the temperatures. So far she was right.