Jorge POV
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I really, REALLY don't wanna get up. Fuck. I'm so tired. I rubbed my eyes harshly as my alarm pinged in my ears. I wish Benji was in some of my classes today. That would at least give me one thing to look forward to other than lunch.
I got up and took a quick shower. Afterwards fixing my hair and adding a bit of blush to my cheeks. I put on a sweater to cover up my recent scars and headed downstairs, listening to my favorite songs with earbuds to hopefully lighten my mood. With that, I grabbed a monster energy drink out of the fridge and headed out.
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Arriving into my first class I made my way to my chair, head down to my feet. I was always paranoid. Plus feeling sad for no apparent reason at all.
I sat down at a chair towards the back and looked up to the teacher for instructions. It was art, so the teacher would tell us what to do and then we would have free work time the rest of the class.
She explained that we were painting something that made us happy, and sent us to work. I got out my paints and started to get a few colors out on my palette.
"Jorge, we require you to roll up your sleeves when you paint."
"Do I have to?"
"Yes, it avoids complaints about stained clothing. Now roll them up!" She walked away.
Shit. At least I chose to sit alone, hopefully everyone was too far to notice anything. I rolled up my sleeves and continued getting things out.
I stared at the blank canvas before putting on a base coat of light purpled, oranges, and pinks, with dark blue at the top. I wanted to paint a sunset with a sort of space setting with stars toward the upper part of the canvas. As I was finishing the base coat, I heard the chair beside me scoot out. Fuck.
I looked beside me to see Benji. All my worry seemed to disappear.
"Hey Jeyjey!" Jeyjey. That was cute. No one has ever given me a nickname before. I felt my cheeks go red underneath the blush.
"Hey Benji, I didn't know you were in this class. I didn't see you on Monday."
"Yeah, I just transferred. Turns out I did not like 'current issues'" he rolled his eyes playfully.
"Oh cool! I'm glad, I didn't have any friends in this class." He laughed and began painting perfectly detailed flowers on his canvas, which already had a light shade of purple as the background.
"I like your flowers, they're really pretty"
He smiled
"Oh thanks." I could tell he was blushing. I finished off most of the sunset and began to paint tiny stars. As I lightly stroked with my paint brush, I felt eyes on me. Benji was definitely looking at me.
"Jorge.."
"Hm?" I asked turning to face him a little more. I noticed his gaze going straight towards my arms. Shit.
"What are those?" I'm panicking.
"Uhh they're nothing." I quickly put my hands in my lap, arms under the table. I stared down at them, ashamed.
Benji gently took one arm, softly gliding his delicate fingers over each scar. My breathing hitched as he touched the newest ones. God, he must think I'm pathetic. To my confusion, he brought my arm slowly up to lips, and he kissed my arm once, directly on top of the fresh scars. He was just so, sweet.
He smiled at me sympathetically. He held my arm with one hand, and rolled his sleeve up with the other. Why was he rolling his up? I gasped almost un-audibly. My eyes had to be deceiving me. Scars? There's no way. How could he ever do this to himself? He's so beautiful..
"Jey, I understand. I'm not gonna be one to freak out every time I see these. Cause I get it.. I mean I hated it when people called me out for it, but I just want you to know that I care about you, and I wanna help you love yourself t-too.."
Wait. Too? I'm confused. There wasn't any recent scars on him. They all seemed to be rather old. But nonetheless, I could tell that he really did understand. No one else I knew ever did, and the fact the he did, gave me a new sort of comfort I didn't understand.. but I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I smiled softly at him, gazing deep into his brown eyes.
"Thank you Benji. I, Ive never had anyone understand me like this before."
"Of course. I really do care about you Jey." He rubbed my hand tenderly with his thumb.
"I care about you too Benjamin."
He blushed and looked back to his canvas. Through out the rest of the class we talked about subjects that came up. It was just so easy for me to talk to him. I felt like I could be myself. He made me feel safe, somehow.
We finished our paintings in the last few minutes of the class. After we put everything always the bell rang, and I had zoned out everything and everyone except for Benji. We walked out of the class hand in hand, till we separated for the next one. What a shame.. I wish I could hold his hand every second, of every day.
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Welp it's 2 am but I wanna start challenging myself to upload every night soo- yea here ya go
Also I was crushed today finding out that they are NOT moving in together 😔😭 BUT Benji said in an insta livestream that it is a step forward I guess? Since Jorge isn't living with his parents anymore and he said they just need to find a place they actually wanna live in 😳😳 sjdbdjkdjdjd
Anyways I'm really excited and I realllyyyy want them to do it or like take the next step whateva that is idk I'm just happy abt it
Mmk that's all sorry for the mini rant ily all
bye luvss
Word count: 1028
January 13, 2020
