Flashback

Chapter Six: Scream

I stared into a pair of cerulean eyes, reddened, bloodshot, and agonized. He stared right back at me. His expression was one of agony, sadness, reminiscences, and apology. It was practically oozing out of him. The aura around him screamed at me, saying, "Emma, please, I didn't know. Let me make it up to you! I didn't know! Let me apologize!"

My expression, on the other hand, was one of shock, surprise, reminiscences, and of course, the strongest, hatred; pure, seething, blood-red, boiling hatred for this person and for his unbelievable actions. Hatred for the way he was merely a lost teenager with broken dreams and hopes, whom I approached with the intentions of befriending.

Exactly one year ago, I had met a pale, terrified teenage boy with worried cerulean eyes that screamed for help. It had seemed that his eyes had screamed to me that they had seen too much pain, agony, and suffering; those eyes that had witnessed too much to bear.

I had approached a teenage boy whose body was frail, with clothes hanging off his deflated frame as if on a hanger. His eyes had flicked about as they took in the scene of the new school and surroundings. He had looked like a fish out of the ocean, a lion in a poisoned pool. He was a boy out of his environment. I had felt that it was perfectly alright though, because after all, everyone was new. It had been nothing to be worried about. Not that anyone of us had really imagined fitting in immediately. Apparently he had imagined easily fitting in, and couldn't find the reminder of home in any crevice, any crack of the school grounds. So, I had decided to take it upon myself to help him make himself feel at home.

It may have seemed like the sweetest, kindest act from the perspective of an outsider. While in fact, it was the dumbest move of my life and you'll understand soon why my helping a peer was stupid. I had never been one of those people who would help poor souls back on their paths. So what had made my feet move towards him? What had made me get up from the wooden bench under the willow tree, close my book, which shows how important he seemed to me at that moment, and made my way to his standing form opposite to mine.

He had been leaning against the opposite tree, another willow, and had been trying to act all casual. He didn't seem to know that his tries were useless to me, though. They weren't working at all because of his constantly flitting eyes and the shaking of his hands. He had not been shaking from the cold; it was a pleasant May afternoon, which was rare. Good thing too, I hated it when it went above 30°C. I loved the cold, though.

"Bonjour." I had said in French to the blue-eyed boy in jeans and a Coldplay T-shirt.

"Sorry, what?" He had asked in accented English. It wasn't European, that was for sure, but there was the probability that it was a South American accent.

"Sorry, hello." I had chuckled and tried again in English.

"Hi." He had reluctantly replied.

"Emma, and you?"

"Ryan. 'S-sup?" He had answered with an obvious reluctance and stutter in his tone. The reason for this I had not known quite yet.

I remembered laughing at his pathetic attempt at being casual. "Oh, come on. Let's get you to the office. They'll help you out. Let's go." I had motioned with my head towards the Administration Block as I spoke.

I had smiled at him, seeing an expression of relief flash across his face and finally staying in place. He had followed me, pulling a black suitcase behind him. I had already gotten settled in around 6 AM and so had had enough time to roam the grounds and already get lost a gazillion times. He had followed me to the office without question, and I had taken a simpler route for his benefit. If it had been just me, I would have easily taken the shorter, inner and much more complicated route. The simpler route was longer but I didn't want the new kid getting confused so soon.

"Excuse me?" He had called to me, probably having forgotten my name already.

"It's Emma, you can call me Em. Everybody does. And yeah?"

"I sort of came late and missed the guide. So yeah, and I sort of don't like the office lady. She's... Well I don't know...kind of...weird?" Another attempt at keeping it casual.

"Ryan, I totally get it. It's alright. Just know this for future guides: missing such things is not a really good idea. You would be stuck if it weren't for me." I'd said proudly, gaining a chuckle from him. Right then, I had thought that maybe he wasn't such a bad person after all; maybe we could become friends one day.

"Emmy?" I snapped back to the present and my breathing hitched at the sight of the person I'd considered my friend soon after our first meeting ever, the guy who ended up betraying me. The guy I thought I could help fit in at the university. The guy who seemed so lost in a foreign country. The guy who could make me giggle unstoppably till my cheeks hurt and I had to pout to stop the pain from the stretching of my cheek muscles.

Now, he was merely a reminder of mistrust and the betrayal I would always symbolize with him. Now, he would only be the person who brought me pain and suffering, suffering beyond thought and his worst nightmares. Now, I cringed from his nickname for me. I wouldn't let him call me that sweet name that would put a smile on my face. Now, he wouldn't call me anything because the next moment, I heard a shriek from somewhere close. I heard an inhumane, high pitched shriek of terror and agony. I heard a shriek that I realized had left my own throat, and reverberated throughout the hallway, outside and till where and who heard, I was unable to tell.

I screamed because all I cared about right at that moment was that Ryan was standing in front of me with his heart in his hands and his hands covering his ears, his eyes shut tight from the impact of my reaction to his presence. Because I wanted comfort and he was a mere cold shoulder; a cold, empty, shell of a beautiful-faced human who had no heart or brain. Because no matter how many times he had looked at me with those cerulean eyes full of supposed care, promising happiness and security, they were now empty lies made to let me bring my walls down. Because now I couldn't let the cold from a dead, heartless being enter my slowly thawing body to cause frostbite once again. I wouldn't allow it.

"Emmy, stop, please stop, Emmy, please!" A hand at my shoulder, likely Ryan's, was furiously brushed off as I jerked away.

"SHUT UP! SHUT UP, YOU PATHETIC EXCUSE OF A HUMAN BEING! SHUT UP AND NEVER CALL ME THAT AGAIN! DON'T YOU DARE 'EMMY' ME, YOU SORRY ASS!! GO AWAY!"

I shrieked at the top of my lungs, adding a bit of sarcasm and sass to the increasing terror, to try and alert everyone to help me, alerting anyone who could hear the tone of my voice.

"Emma! Stop, it's alright. GUARDS! NOW! OVER HERE!"

I couldn't stop shrieking as all the terrorizing memories of my kidnapping came rushing back, the memories of the blood, the pain, the hurt, the agony, the torture. The creatures that ought not to be called men at all, for their actions were not humane. I was falling slowly, yet I did not land on the ground at all. I was in someone's arms and the shrieking had finally stopped. My head was pounding from pain of all sorts. Muffled voices surrounded me, urgent, angry, rushed voices. I could hear someone sobbing. I realized there were two people sobbing, not just one.

The first one I noticed was myself, since the salty tears were on my lips. The second I couldn't see as I was lifted off my feet and into large, warm arms. I heard the urgent thumping of a heart as my right ear made contact with the fiber over a shirt. I probably lost consciousness then just as my eyes made contact with hazel ones that earlier that day gave me solace and the real sense of security in less than a second. My vision blurred and all sounds seized as I lost consciousness.