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Piece of My Mind

Poetry

These are pieces that I have written that have came straight from the darkest places in my mind. A lot of these do have a lot of emotion put into them, so I must say that some of these are a TRIGGER WARNING! If I trigger any of you, I apologize. Thi...

#anxietyattacks #anxietydisorder #bipolardisorder #depression #shotsfired #suicidalthoughts #suicideattempt #takewhatyouwant

I'm Fine

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by young_verse

by young_verse

Inspired by Witt Lowry (Oxygin)

(Feel the weight lift off me)
Damn, back at it again
(Someone tell my wife I'm sorry)
I'm getting closer to the end

I know I need to live with the fact there is things I can't change
But I cant live with the fact that I'm drowning in my brain
All these demons talking to me is driving me insane
Look down on my bare skin, that's where I cause myself pain
Pushing twenty, that was a simpler time
That's when I got to call my wife mine
Not to mention I saw my grandmother shine
I remember that almost brought tears to my eyes
Couple years later and I'm feeling the stress
Every day now, I get asked if I'm depressed
I always want to feel something, maybe nothing is best
People look at me and say your doing better than the rest
My dad said he dealt with the same shit
Theres a couple times he wanted to quit
But he looked at me and remained lit
But he still raised his hand and took the hit
Damn....
I would always go to school broken and bruised
My friends would always ask "What happened to you?"
I told them that I didn't know, that even I was confused.
My dad told me he was sorry and that there was no excuse,
Dad....

I've been lying, saying I'm fine
My wife keeps telling me it takes time
I just want to unwind
My doc says take these and you'll be fine
I just want to feel the weight lift off me
Someone tell my wife I'm sorry
Cause I've been lying, saying I'm fine
When I just want to feel all... right

I have suicidal thoughts but I push them back in my mind
My wife keeps telling me I'm one of a kind
I wish that was a thought that I could get behind
But I'm still waiting for my stars to align
My body took in this depression straight to the heart
And now all it is doing is just tearing me apart
I would give anything just to restart
Maybe then I will live life smart
But now I got two pieces of my heart
I need to be there for my wife and daughter now
Baby girl, I hope you know that daddy will always be proud
And I will always be here when you're feeling down
I'll write you a song and you'll always hear its sound
Everytime I'm thinking, it's time I take my last breath
I go back to the time your mother was close to death
You wouldnt believe how much she bled
Just to get you take your first breath
So this letter I write to depression and I couldn't do without you
"For so long it was just me an you
You almost killed me and that's true
But now I'm here to over power you
I tried every drug in the book but none of them hit me the same
As my wife and daughter looking at me with a smile on their face
Nothing feels better when the people you love are chanting your name
I almost said goodbye to it all and you're the one to blame."
Damn....
For twelve years, I didnt talk to the man above me
Eventhough, he spent that time trying to reach to me
Saying this is the man I want you to be
Someone will come along and sweep you off your feet
And he was right, look at me now
Married and I'm a father now
I have finally made my dad proud
I feel like I could wear a crown
So dear depression this goes out to you and yours
Despite how many times I fell through the floors
I came to take back my life of mine that never was yours
It's always been mine, IT NEVER WAS YOURS!!!!