To My Ex

The Final Chapter of You and I

You are still the love of my life and I don't know, i guess, i just thought I was yours too.

It took me a while to get over the cheating with Ashley but as time went by, it hurt less and less. You seemed to look at me differently but in a good way, you know.

We picked our promise rings for each other's christmas presents. I knew right then and there that if you were to propose that I would say yes. I know, I know, i said that i wouldn't but how could i not when you are the one thing in the world that has ever made me this happy.

I know we fight a lot and Im far from being perfect when we do but i don't know, i just always thought no matter what happened we'd get through it.
When we fought, I'd go to my "happy place." It's not necessary a physical place but a memory. The memory.

You know, the one that you spent the night at my house and we stayed up all night playing plants vs zombies. I don't think you knew how much that meant to me. I didn't have anyone that I felt close to or made me smile.

At one point in time, you asked why were you special. I couldn't put it in a coherent sentence so i shrug my shoulders. The words seemed to couldn't find its way out of my mouth but i ensure you that they were trying to escape.

I wanted to say that in all the awfulness and abuse that i have endure, you were the thing that kept me fighting. I use to go to your house in hopes to see you, even if it was just a glimpse. Just to see you smile and laugh made everything okay. That feeling that i get and still do when i see you smile is why your so special to me.

The same reason is why I'm not gonna leave you. Even if we are just friends, I don't care. You know everything that I've been through and, without knowing, you've helped me through it.

This doesn't excuse the cheating and lying. Because of these actions I no longer see a family with us, I no longer wish for us to have a daughter together, and I will no longer will pick up my heart that you've crushed and give it right back to you. But that doesn't mean I don't want to talk to you in the future.