she makes me weak | cazzie

cotton candy slurpees

We're parked outside a 7-eleven, four miles away from home with slurpees in our hands. If I'm being honest, I could care less about the slurpees but it was the perfect excuse to be alone with her. I smile at the memory of the last time we were here, a little more nervous and a little less in love. We had no idea for the wild ride that was yet to come.

Some upbeat pop song about sex and depression is playing on the radio, barely audible. I stare out into the sky, appreciating the mesmerizing view but it can't compare to the girl sitting beside me. Next to me is Izzie, occasionally taking sips of her drink. Her long, raven hair flows perfectly to the side. She's dressed in a crop top paired with shorts, exposing her toned body. She makes it really hard not to stare.

"Can you believe we'll be seniors starting tomorrow? Aren't you excited?" Izzie asks euphorically.

"So excited! I can't wait to waste away another year of my precious youth to school!" I joke sarcastically.

She rolls her eyes in response, "Don't be a party pooper! This year should be memorable. We have senior field trips, grad night, even prom." she raises her eyebrows and smirks.

"I would volunteer to be your date but I don't have a limousine laying around like most guys at Clayton do," I say apologetically.

"C'mon! I've been waiting four years for this! Plus you'd look super cute in a dress and I could even do your makeup!" Izzie suggests getting a little too excited.

"First off, ew. I don't do dresses, I don't do makeup, and I definitely don't do prom. I will however make an exception under one condition," I turn my head her direction and give a conceited smirk.

"And that is?" she furrows her eyebrows, waiting for a response.

I take a long, loud sip of my slurpee to leave her in suspense. "I'll be your date only if I could wear a suit," I say so confidently.

"Oh no. Please not the tweed suit," Izzie jokes causing us both to giggle.

"Oh gosh. Thinking about that suit makes me itch but it was worth seeing the disgust in Paige's face."

"We were all over each other that day. I can't blaim garbage girl for thinking we were a couple," Izzie brings back a flood a memories.

"Hey! As I recall, you were all over me!" I defend.

"Was not!" she crosses her arms like a child.

"Hm let's see. You called yourself my date and you literally fed me cheese!"

"I guess I was just so turned on by that sexy tweed suit," Izzie's contagious laugh rubs off on me.

The laughter dies down after a few seconds. "So anyways, I'll think about it... prom I mean." Izzie gives me a slight smile and shakes her head okay.

The brunette changes the subject and I can't help but get lost in the way she moves. The way her facial expressions match perfectly with her hand gestures. The way her jaw moves when she talks. The way she furrows her eyebrows when something doesn't make sense or the way she bites her lips when she's thinking. I could watch her for hours.

I'm throwing it all away for her, all my plans. I'm diving into the dip end. As much as I hate Elsa's obsession with being in control, I'll admit that I loved being in control. I was in control of where I was heading and I would never let anything stop me. I had a plan. I'd go to college far from Elsa but close to Doug and Sam. Then I'd move in with my perfect boyfriend, Evan. I'd wait till he proposed then we'd move into a house big enough for our kids and grow old together. I'd be happy with him. I was already on my way. I'd have a safe, stable life and I was determined to avoid any risks. I was so close that I could almost taste it. That was until she came along. I'm not going a city away from Elsa anymore, I might be in another state away from her if I go to Ucla with Izzie. Although this sounds like the deal of a lifetime, especially having Elsa as your mother and I'd never admit it but but I'm terrified of moving that far. Prior to Izzie, I never even acknowledged the idea of being with a girl but now I'm ready to start my life with one. Would Izzie and I move in together? Don't even get me started on how we would-