Stella Rose is a normal 17 year old girl. There's not much about her that isn't normal. She doesn't have a crazy popular girl coming at her. She doesn't have much of a cliche high school movie life. She's just Stella. Stella Rose. But maybe with a l...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
"Stella, it's time for you to snap out of this" I shake my head and look away from my phone screen i've been staring at.
"What?" Milo shakes his head.
"That's the only word i've got out of you for the past day. Just.. I don't know what's going on because you won't tell me, god you won't even speak" I sigh and turn off my phone. I feel tears in my eyes. Why am I being so emotional? Probably about to start my period or something.
"Stell" Milo says sadly and pulls me into a hug. I hug him back and cry. Okay, but like if anyone walked into the library right now they'd be scared.
"I just, don't know what to do, Milo" I pull back from the hug.
"Do what, Stella? You won't tell me anything. I'm not making you either, but I can't help if you don't tell me" I know he's right. I also feel bad for coming to him with all my problems.
"Christopher told me some stuff, and the thing he told me... I don't know if I should be with him anymore" Milo nods and I feel the stinging again. I quickly wipe my eyes and rub my nose.
"Is it that bad?" I nod. I honestly don't know what to do. I know it's not about me at all, but can I really like someone who would do something like that? I mean, it was the drugs, but doing drugs is a whole different thing. Drugs can fuck someone up, like what they did to Christopher, but that's just an excuse that I want to use to make it help my cause.
"I can't get him out of my mind. It's the only thing I think about now. I don't want to like him after what he told me, but I still do. I shouldn't, but I do. I want him. He even said he... loved me" Milos eyes grow wide as I recall how he told me, well, blurted.
"Christopher just tell m-.." I was cut off.
"I told him I was in love with you okay?"
A small smile makes its way onto my face, but wipes off almost as fast as it came. I can't have these feelings. I can't.
"Why didn't you tell me this? He loves you? It seems like you love him too, but I can't tell you how you feel. I don't know what the fuck he did to make you think you can't like him, but it doesn't have to do with you, you even said that yourself. I'm just saying, how can you not like him for something he did, but it wasn't towards you? Sure, if I knew what he did, I might feel different about it, but with the information you gave me... this is what i'm giving you back"
"But, Milo.. there's so much more to the story than that. He... he messed up big i know it wasn't towards me, but I don't want him to repeat anything he did. I'm just stuck between two things to do. It's like the angel and devil on my shoulders. The angel is telling me to stay away, but the devil is telling me to stay. The right choice is to leave him, but I want to be with him. I want to help him through it. I want what sounds like the impossible with him" tears fall down as i finish. I can't help it. I want to be with him. I truly want to.
The angel is right there. Not wanting me to be with him because of his mistakes, but the devil is telling me to be with him no matter what. I wouldn't exactly call it a devil though. It seems right and understanding.
"Okay, I watched this too long from my office, what's up?" Mr. R says as he makes his way towards us. I let out a small laugh.
"She's having guy drama" Mr. R nods at Milo then turns to me.
"I don't understand how she can have all this drama. Just a month ago she only had you" Milo gasps and I let out another laugh. There's Mr. R for you. Always making us laugh.
"So what's up?" R sits down, and I stand up.
"Mi, can you fill him in? I need to calm down if that's fine with you, Mr R" Milo nods and so does R.
I wipe under my eyes, grab my phone, and a paper in case a teacher stops me for "skipping class", and leave the library.
I don't know what to do. I haven't seen Christopher since the dinner when he left me outside.
I sit in the same spot shocked. He actually hit someone, hit a girl. His ex girlfriend, then left with no warning, no apology, no anything.
I stand up, but almost fall back down. I take hold of the chair next to me to steady myself.
I rub my eyes making sure i'm not in a dream. Maybe this all didn't happen. Maybe it's all just a dream. Maybe he didn't actually tell me that. Maybe it just didn't happen. Maybe... I'm cut off by a water droplet falling in my arm. I look up and see the sky is growing grey.
It's raining? More droplets fall on me as I look up. It never rains in California. What a coincidence. The sky is also feeling confused, sad, and heartbroken too.
It starts pouring in the matter of seconds, and if anyone saw this they'd be seeing a 17 year old girl, crying in the rain, not being able to breathe, hyperventilating for the second time today, and just dying right then and there.
I'd be freaked out and call the police.
"Stella? Come on we have to go" I turn to the voice and see my mom standing at the back door. Luckily for me she can't see my tears as the rain pours on me.
I walk closer to the door and hear my dad asking if it's raining. I nod even though he probably won't be able to see me.
"Stella! You're soaking!" I shake alittle from the cold ac on my wet skin and clothes.
"It's fine" I say and hug myself.
"Why were you standing in the rain? And where's Chris?" My mom asks. I just shrug.
"I like rain, you know that, and Christopher, had a call so he had to leave" I lie. They nod as Claire rushes down the hall.
"I'll get you a shirt and pants, you can wear that" I thank her when she comes back. My parents started a conversation about how it never rains in California and nonsense. Claire comes back with more sweat pants and a hoodie.
"Here, these are some of my old pants, you can have them, they don't fit me anymore, and here's one of Chris' hoodies. He has too many he won't notice one's gone" She smiles at me and I give her a thankful smile back and go into the bathroom.
I quickly change out of the wet clothes and into the warm ones. I smell the hoodie out of habit and get a whiff of Christopher. I know, weird, but... I can't not.
He told me he loves me.
How can I not forgive him?
Is it my place to forgive him? What am I forgiving him about? It's nothing to do with me, but I feel like it does.
The smell of the hoodie fills my nose, and I grip onto it.
