| Love me or leave me |

6 - motherly love

\ Y/NS MOTHERSS BEDROOM / Y/N P.O.V

y/n: mum?

She was face down on her mattress, getting as much rest as she could before she had to leave again. y/ns mum: what was that boy doing here?

My body stiffened and my heartbeat increased, y/n: hes just a classmate that got caught in the rain mum. It wasnt anything like what youre thinking.

Please please believe me. y/ns mum: hmm if thats all then, sorry for yelling.

y/n: its okay, Im used to it.

She shifted slightly, then sat up fully. Her eyes glaring into my own, y/ns mum: whats that supposed to mean?

y/n: I didnt m-mean it like that! Its just you yell a lot, so it doesnt affect me that much anymore.

Her face turned angry and she furrowed her eyebrows in frustration, y/ns mum: you better watch your mouth y/n. Im not the one who destroyed this family – your lucky you still live here.

Her words were like knives, twisting and turning into me. I was bleeding out and all she could do was blame me. y/n: why is everything my fault? What did I do that was so wrong?!

her scoff was loud and mean, y/ns mum: what did you do? What did you do?! Your gay! What do you mean what did you do?! How is it not your fault?! He abanded us because you failed him, you failed me. All of this, I like boys talk! who could live with a son who loves someone elses son?! Tell me that! Who?!

Tears streamed down my face and my voice broke as I spoke, y/n: I thought, you loved m-me

Her face turned to irritation as the words left my mouth, y/ns mum: I wish I could. I wish you didnt like boys and I wish your father hadnt left. But wishing gets you nowhere.

My tears were thick and hot, and my sobs left my mouth as I bent down to try and catch my breath, y/ns mum: stop being so dramatic, its not like Im kicking you out. How would that look for me? Not good thats what. So be thankful Im keeping you around and letting you stay.

She sighed deeply before checking the time. Her face turned into panic as she quickly got ready for her second job. Pushing her way past me as I stood up, running for the door. I didnt move from my spot as I heard my mum slam the front door, her tires screeching on the road from her speed. I stayed there, in her room, frozen and lifeless. I pair of arms encircled my waist and warmth spread across my back and shoulder.

Felix: I heard everything. Im sorry.

His words didnt make its way to my ears. My body shut down and I felt completely numb. Felix noticed this and let go. Tugging me by my hand, leading the way to my room. He closed the curtains and the door as I stood by the end of my bed. My breathing becoming irregular and loud. Panic washed over my body as realization hit me. I was all alone in this world – no one, not even my parents loved me. First it was sadness then it was anger. Before Felix could reach me I walked over to my dresser, picked up the frame and threw it, hard. It smashed against a wall and I picked up another one. Smashing them one by one. Felix rushed to my side to stop me as I mercilessly stomped on a frame, my feet being cut in the process. His voice slowly calmed me down, whispering sweet nothings to sooth me, Felix: hey hey hey its okay. Youre okay, calm down.

The waterworks started back up as I looked around to see the mess I created, Felix: just breath, Im here. Your going to be fine.

He pulled me into his embrace, and I melted into his touch. Losing control of my legs we both dropped to the floor. My fingers clawed at his back as my sobs were muffled by his chest. They were quickly replaced by Felixs deep voice in my ear shooshing me. He slowly stood up, helping me up and to the bed. Leaving briefly to find band aides and bandages.

FELIX P.O.V

I finally found band aides big enough for the cuts on y/ns feet. Coming back I found him passed out where I left him. Being soft and gentle I quickly fixed up his foot, then, moving him under the covers – quickly joining him too hold him close. A sniffle could be heard, then followed by a small thank you. he hugged me tighter and pushed his head against my chest. A weird feeling appeared, and I kissed him on his head. Slowly drifting off to sleep with him in my arms.