I'd be lying if I said I didn't regret running away. Even though they treated me horribly I was now to fend for myself in a world the where careless to teach me about. I followed a worn dirt path from my ex-home into the dense forestry beyond me, I'd live somewhere far from here now. The walking was endless and tiresome. Sometimes when I get bored of remembering the long tedious walk ahead of me my mind wanders back to my life before now. It was almost a sinister thing, even though they where like me they had no common decency for me. They forced me to wear a collar and call them names want to dehumanize myself. Whoever knew ones own mind could be so cruel. Regardless I was only kept because of my status, a 'well-off' alpha family and their 'beautiful' daughter. At first I didn't mind anything they did I just thought I was doing something wrong and so I set out to never do those things again in fear of upsetting them. Although I soon learned the problem wasn't my behavior it was me I was their problem as they where my problem. Having a daughter for the pack isn't all to great even I understand a male would have been better. They were so careless in their ways as I look upon my own figure even I can see how much longer I would have lasted in their cruel world. I would be set to be with a strong male in the pack so no other packs would try and forge anything upon mine. But the male was mean and only cared for the status he'd supposedly inherit from being mine. Father did not care, mother was not there. I never understood why they didn't just have another pup I mean it's not like your bound to always birth females but I guess that's what they thought. I've heard the stories about my parents the once 'happy and kind' couple shattered by my birth. They argued and argued getting more physical each day. It soon became routine for anyone around to either side with one of them or retreat to their own dens. Life could have been a dream for me, if only I had be born a male. Thinking of the possibilities of everything that would be different if I happened to be male was surely upsetting. It was like a sick twisted way they got to remain in my mind and torment me even after I left. Everyone else including myself know my mother and father where seeking different mates after all the drama with me that's when everything got worse. All the once friendly members of the pack became cold and selfish it was almost like nobody had any empathy or soft feeling left in their being, like a cloud of darkness had been cast by a demonic entity trying to asset it's dominance over them. It was unbearable to say the least, the way they began to treat one another even the pups began to catch onto their parents behavior and act accordingly. If only I was male none of this would have ever happened. I wasn't allowed to express myself either I may be a female but I desire to break my sad label and indulge in the freedom of being all or none. It's something I've been thinking about for a while now since I left. I'd have all the freedom I want to express myself! To make as many changes as I wanted for so long. I had decided the first person I meet will not know me as a female or male but as someone in between and unbound by a label. Wether they accepted it or not wouldn't be my problem. I'd travel the world till I found a place to call home and truly be happy, a place to truly belong. It was almost to much, bringing slight tears of joy to my weary eyes as my mind wandered endlessly thinking of all the happy things ahead of me. I was no longer part of that sinister pack I would be my own person now and nobody will stop me.
