Let Me In

Chapter Eighteen

"I'm fairly confident Nagini would be a horcrux, The Dark Lord has always kept her too close and protected for her to just be a pet" Severus spoke, more to himself than to Hermione
"won't Professor Dumbledore have already thought of that?"
"perhaps, although I can't be sure of what he knows considering the old fool never thought it appropriate to share anything with me" he scowled, Hermione knew it truly hurt him, though he would never admit it, the fact that the headmaster never seemed to trust him entirely, after everything he had done to prove his loyalty. Like all things though, he resigned himself to the fact that it was just another irritating part of his cruel, miserable life and there was not a lot he could do about it.
"So, we have: the ring, which the Headmaster took care of; the diary, which Harry destroyed in the chamber of secrets; possibly Nagini. There has to be more. When Harry spoke about Slughorn's memory he spoke about You-Know-Who asking whether it was possible to split the soul into seven" Hermione pulled at her wild hair, getting exasperated
"but we don't know whether he succeeded, Hermione"
"Harry and Dumbledore were supposed to be going out the night the castle was raided, maybe they were going to look for another one"
"it's possible, but we have no way of knowing until we manage to speak to them, and I don't want to risk that yet. Everyone is most definitely going to be upset with me for abandoning my position as spy, and they will be equally as upset with you for coming with me, I bet Moody is thoroughly enjoying telling everyone that he knew I was a traitor all along" there was a certain edge to his voice which made it clear to Hermione exactly what he thought of Moody
"but the raid was two days ago. We can't just sit here forever; we have to do something! All the while we're sat cooped up in this house, The Dark Lord is getting stronger and Harry is getting closer to the fight, something I always imagined myself being part of" the frustration was clear in her voice, it was evident that she didn't enjoy sitting around idly while others did the work, Severus understood this, he too was getting annoyed, and, inevitably, they were beginning to take it out on each other
"You may not have noticed, foolish girl, but I didn't force you to come with me, no one is holding you here against your will and if you want to leave then by all means, go ahead, although I will regret not being able to say 'I told you so' when one of the aurors eventually return with your lifeless body"
Smack.
Hermione slapped him, hard, across the face and his eyes grew dark and deadly as he glared at her
"don't you dare speak to me like some pathetic child, Severus Snape. You may be the big bad death eater your pupils have come to fear but I'm not scared of you and you're not going to intimidate me into getting your own way. I followed you here because I told you I trust you, and I still do, but I can't sit here forever and wait for the war to pass us by. My friends are out there, in a fight I should be a part of, people I love and care about are dying while I sit here reading books! Do you have any idea how helpless that makes me feel?" By this point Hermione was crying and shouting and Snape's expression softened, he pulled her into his chest and let her sob into his shirt. After a few minutes of uncontrollable sobs, he decided that was enough and pulled back slightly, though without breaking their embrace
"I'm sorry, I know this is difficult for you and we're both feeling a little hot tempered. First thing tomorrow we'll floo headquarters and face our verbal lashings together but, Hermione, right now there is not a lot we can do but sit here and research. The second I step out of the confines of this safe house, unless I go directly to Grimmauld Place, I will be traceable through my mark, we will be found and killed in less than five minutes. I hate being stuck here too, believe me, of all the places I could be, this is not my favourite, but I cannot let anything happen to you. We will speak to the order in the morning and figure out a plan from there, okay?" He looked at her so sincerely; that one expression silently saying more than they had ever managed out loud. She nodded and pulled herself back into his chest, he kissed the top of her head very gently, almost as if she would run away screaming at the thought of having him kiss her. When he was confident she wasn't going anywhere, he pulled back slightly and pressed a firmer kiss to her forehead. She sighed and hugged him tighter, before they both pulled away and returned to their books, feeling a lot better after getting their little dispute off their chests.
"Are you sure it's not an option to just kill him?" Hermione half joked an hour later, when they were no closer to figuring out how to break the vow
"as much as it has crossed my mind, no. I may have killed people out of necessity in the past, and that was difficult enough, but I refuse to murder the old fool, though I have often come close in the past. I cannot have that kind of guilt on my conscience for the rest of my life" Hermione nodded understandingly. Though that didn't help their predicament. She knew they were running on borrowed time, if they didn't find a solution soon the war and all their work would be irrelevant, and Professor Snape would die anyway. She pushed that thought from her mind, she wouldn't let that happen, she would protect him to her dying breath. She was a Gryffindor, unbreakable vow or not, she was damn well not going to let anything happen to him.
"I'm going to make tea" she huffed forty minutes later, getting irritated by the lack of progress they were making
"how very British of you" he mocked, half-heartedly and she stomped her way into the kitchen, a little louder than necessary. Among many of the other flaws at Spinners end, the one that bugged Hermione the most was how slow the house seemed to be at doing remedial tasks. Light bulbs seemed to take at least twenty minutes to fully brighten, the hot water took at least a couple of hours to warm up enough for a bath and, right now, watching the tea kettle ever so slowly fight to warm on the stove, Hermione – for the first time in her life – found herself wishing Severus owned a house elf. She must really be going mad in this house, not once in her life had she ever felt the urge to abuse the power and magic of those poor elves.
Elves. Magic. Power. She dropped her tea-cup and sprinted back to Severus
"Elves! House Elves!"
"please tell me this isn't an attempt to revive Spew" he mocked, raising an eyebrow but motioning with his hand for her to sit. She glared at him
"don't be ridiculous. House Elves. They're arguably the most powerful magical creatures, right?"
"Yes" he answered, sceptically, not sure where she was going with this "though we do not know the exact limits to their magic as no one has ever been bothered to find out, frankly"
"that's what I mean though! What if they have the ability to rid someone of an unbreakable vow? I mean, think about it. A house elves magic is rivalled by none and, though the vow is a very strong and finite piece of magic for us, it may be something that is simple for an elf" Hermione studied Severus' face for a moment, trying to read his thoughts on his face. He seemed to be deep in thought, his eyes gleaming with what, Hermione could only describe as, hope. A look she'd never seen him wear before, and it caused her to grin widely; triumphantly
"that may just be insane enough to work. Though, I have to say I've never heard of using an elf to break a vow before" he stroked his chin pensively "I shall speak to the headmaster about it in the morning"
"do you think he'll speak to you?"
"he won't be happy with me, but speak with me? I'm afraid he has no choice"
That night Hermione went to bed feeling more optimistic than she had in a long time. For the first time in the last few dreary months, she felt a glimmer of hope. She could vaguely see the outline of her future and she reached out to grasp it with both hands. If there was one thing she was sure of, it was that she was going to see this thing – whatever it may be – that she had with Severus, through to the end. The problem was, she wasn't exactly sure what it was they had. She was almost positive that they were together, though they hadn't explicitly said those words but she was at a loss when it came to relationships. Sure, she'd kind of experimented with Viktor two years ago, but that never went beyond a quick awkward kiss – and then there was her disaster date with McLaggen (the less said about that the better) but when it came to Severus Snape, she was not ashamed to admit she was completely out of her depth.
After having a long, hard conversation with herself, she decided the only way to resolve this was to just speak to Severus. She knew he was a blunt man, he hated people who tried to play mind games and he didn't suffer fools gladly. So, gathering all of the Gryffindor courage she could muster, and hurrying before she changed her mind, she made her way along the cold, dusty corridor to his bedroom and quietly tapped on the door
"come in, Hermione" he called and she sheepishly stepped around the door, closing it behind her. His bedroom at Spinner's End was very unlike his chambers at Hogwarts. It was small, unkept and, honestly, Hermione feared, as she did with the whole house, that it was on the verge of collapsing at any moment. He had an old double bed, not as big as the king size he had back at the school (and not nearly as comfortable looking too, she noticed) and a single desk and chair over by a small window that had no curtain "are you ok?" He asked as she stood across from him, looking at her hands, trying to think of how she was going to word this
"yes, I'm fine. Just... collecting my thoughts" he stayed quiet, examining her, silently waiting for her to continue. He opened her mouth to speak, and then closed it again, realising she had no idea how to have this conversation. She was relieved when he finally spoke first
"is it about the house elves? Have you found something?" She shook her head
"no, its about... us"
"I see... Well, I knew it was only going to be a matter of time"
"what?"
"I'm not a fool, Hermione, I've known you are beyond my reach since I first learned of your... feelings toward me. I knew it wouldn't be long before you came to your senses and ran away screaming. Honestly I'm surprised it's taken this long"
"Severus, what are you talking about?" She scolded him "you've gotten it completely wrong. I'm not here to leave you" she laughed dryly "I'm here because..." she took a deep breath "I want you to kiss me"