As The Rain Starts To Fall || Oboro/Aizawa

Dreams.

1. Aizawa

-Shirakumo meant the world to me. No matter how much it looked like I always shoved him away if I had the chance, I'd pull him away from the whole world and protect him from anything and everything. I'd let him see how much I really cared, how much I loved him. I could've done this all if I knew he'd be dead. Before I knew it, he slipped from my arms, away from me. Now I'm stuck in this endless storm of useless emotions that get me nowhere but here in this pit of despair and grief. A month has passed. No, two. Actually three. I'm still here. Stuck. Hopeless. I can see the worry on everyone's faces. I had purposely distanced myself from everyone, not caring how much it affected them or how much it affected me. I hated to see their looks of worry and hear their whispers of concern, but I couldn't help but feel numb to it. It was like I didn't know Hizashi anymore, either. He still cares, it shows greatly as he attempts to cheer me up every day. He's a good friend, I'll give him that. But every day he seems to be giving up more and more. I can't blame him. I respect how he feels, I hope he can respect how I feel as well. If I can't get over it, then I can't get over it. It's all hopeless. No one can replace the feeling Oboro had always given me when he was near. He was the sweetest guy to ever be in my life, he was more supportive than Hizashi, even. I just felt like we had a closer bond. When Hizashi was busy, I would laugh so hard that my throat would start to hurt about all those times Oboro had run only in a towel to chase Hizashi, who had stolen his clothes as a prank multiple times. I assure you, almost no one can outrun that guy. After the first few times of Hizashi stealing his clothing, Oboro had started hiding them. Jokes on him, Hizashi was great at finding things. Great times. Great times. I wish I knew Shirakumo would die.

These thoughts were intoxicating and intolerable. I needed a nap. I silently changed out of my uniform, changing into more comfortable clothing. After three months, I'm still in denial, I'm in so much disbelief. I can hardly move on from the fact that it happened. I keep forgetting that he isn't there to text me good morning anymore, let alone a good afternoon or good night. It hurt more than you'd expect it to. Just seeing the notification of him typing sparks a flame in me. Now the remains of the great flame are merely ashes and twigs. I'm tired of being hurt, I'm tired of having that same wave of sadness wash over me time and time again. It's all too familiar to me now. The blank staring at the wall, the thoughts, the dreams.

The dreams.

I think of him. When I close my eyes, it's him. Us together, our future working alongside Hizashi. We planned to start our own agency, just us three. I guess that future perished when Shirakumo passed. Hold on, let's put Zashi to the side for now. Let's discuss this. Me and him. We were two peas in a pod, almost inseparable. I hate using such pathetic and sappy words, but they are the closest things I can use to describe how great my cheerful cloud boy with. Moving on, he was like the cloud to my sky, always accompanying me. But I guess cloudless nights make sense nowadays, I've been seeing more of them each night. Coincidence? I'll think about that. The only coincidence I think of now is that exactly when I thought of night sky, my eyes got heavier. It's time to say goodnight, I guess. Laying down, I pulled the cloud-themed blanket Shirakumo had gotten me for my birthday last year. It was softer than any other blanket I'd owned. I have never and will never put this inside the sleeping bag that I bring to school to matter how comfy this blanket is. It matters too much to me. The downy texture of it reminds me of when I messed with Oboro's hair. It was soft and poofy, almost the feel of the blanket. Sometimes I wonder if he really just went far enough to make a blanket with his own hair. The thought made me smile a little, a grin tugging at my lips. The warmth of the blanket made me sleepier, it felt like one of Oboro's hugs. I felt better. I'm on my way to dreamland.