The Boys' Princess

Prologue

"Kailangan ba talaga to, mommy?"

Tanong ko kay mommy nang may pag-aalinlangan. I am holding her hand and I don't want to let it go.

Ngumiti siya sa akin. She smiled but I can see through her eyes the sadness and loneliness that she doesn't want to show me.

"I'll get you back when we fix everything. I promise," sa tono ng boses ni mommy, alam kong gusto na niyang umiyak pero pinipigilan niya. She never let me see her crying or in pain and that... bothers me a lot.

"Mom," pagmamakaawa ko.

Gusto ko ng umiyak. I don't wanna leave her.

Huminga siya ng malalim. "Serina, we already talked about this."

"Don't worry, I promise. Kapag naayos na to, I will immediately get you back."

Tumango ako.

Walang nagsalita nang ilang mga minuto sa amin hangga't sa naisipan ko ng tanungin yung isang bagay na gustong gusto kong tanungin sa kaniya.

"Maaayos niyo ba to, mom?" Seryosong tanong ko.

Napataas siya ng kilay pero agad din niya itong ibinaba nang maisip kung anong ibig kong sabihin.

"We'll try for the sake of you and Caroline."

"But what if hindi niyo naayos?"

She became silent and speechless.

A tear fell down from my right eye but I got rid of it right away.

"Iiwan niyo ko sa papa ko? Sa pamilya ko na I have never seen, even once?"

I start sobbing. Kahit na anong pigil ko sa sarili ko na 'wag umiyak ay kusa pa ring lumabas ang mga luha ko. I don't want her to see my pain but I can't keep it anymore.

They are sending me to my biological father that in my 16 years of living, I have never seen and met him. I just knew his name and that's it.

It just... hurts.

"It's just a company, Serina. Maaayos namin to ng step dad mo. You know we must focus on company to save it--"

"You must focus on the company na kahit sa hindi ko kilala, ipinapamigay niyo ako?"

"Hindi kita ipinapamigay, Serina! He's your dad! It's still your family!"

Napatulala ako habang nakatingin kay mommy.

"I-I'm sorry, 'nak. I didn't mean to shout." Kumalma ang boses niya.

"Family..."

Malumanay kong sabi.

"S-Serina?"

"I'm sorry, mom." I hugged her. "I just don't know if I must trust him."

"You must," ani mom. "Trust me, Serina. He is trustworthy. I won't be sending you to him if he's not."

Nag-usap pa kami ni mommy habang hinihintay yung flight ko. Nag-aalinlangan pa rin ako sa pag-uwi ko sa Pinas and to my other family but I don't want to argue with her again. I know it's also hard for mom but she still chose this for the company and for our family, especially to me and Caroline.

Habang tinititigan ko si mommy, gusto kong malaman kung okay lang ba to sa kaniya. Kung okay lang ba na pumunta ako sa tatay ko na minsang sinaktan siya. Maiiwan siya dito nang mag-isa. I know that even though mom's with step dad, she will still feel lonely. They need to focus in our company to save it and I don't think they will have time for each other.

Pati si Caroline, umuwi din siya sa grandparents niya. Ayaw niya din noong una pero she was convinced by dad. I also don't want her to leave because I'll be missing her. I'm sure of that.

Pero aalis rin pala ako...

I wonder what she is thinking right now.

Napangiti ako. Last minute ko na dito sa States pero hindi ko man lang siya nakita. Mas maaga kasi siyang umalis.

Even dad.

I smiled and waved my hand to mom before I entered the departure area. Ngumiti din siya sa akin at kinawayan ako. Tumango siya habang nakangiti.

I will miss you, mom.

Good bye...