Midoriya's POV
Todoroki and I decided to watch Heathers. I never watched it before so I hope it's good. It was still raining and thundering. I hate thunder. It reminds me of Painful memories.
Flashback
"
Mommy?" I say looking for Mommy. It started raining outside and I don't like it. It's really loud. THUNDER! "Mommy!" I saw mom running to me. "Izuku! Are you alright?" I was crying. Why am I crying? Heroes don't cry. She looked at the window. "Did the big thunder outside scare you?" I nodded. We went to the couch and she covered me in blankets. "Shhhhh. It's okay. I'll be here. I love you." She said. I was still sobbing. Stop being a crybaby. She then started to sing.
She kept singing until I calmed down. I like it when Mommy sings. Soon later I started to sing. "🎶Fight on just a little while longer. Fight on just a little while longer.🎶" Mommy has a nice voice. I felt my eyes getting heavy. I then saw blackness
Flashback end
"Midoriya?" I woke up seeing todoroki hovering over me. I looked at the TV seeing that the movie was still going on." O-,oh hey todoroki." "Do you want us to end it here?" "Yeah I'm starting to get sleepy." He nodded and turned it off. I looked outside to see that it's still raining. I sighed. "You can sleep in my room. I'll sleep on the couch." "Are you sure Midoriya?" "Yeah sure." No your not. "Well okay. Goodnight Midoriya." He kissed me on the head and left. Oh wow. He actually kissed your ugly ass. I didn't think he had the guts. Stop it. Oh why? Can't bare to here the truth. No. I already know. He's just being nice. That's right. Keep thinking that. He can never save you. You're just pathetic,stupid deku.
Todoroki POV
'Perfect.' I walked into Midoriya room and started to search. I need to find all sharp things and hide it from him. I don't want him hurting himself. I love him. I open his drawer and found a notebook. ' Diary' huh. I open the book. 'this book belongs to Izuku Midoriya. March 24, 2014.' So Midoriya got this when he was 11. I flip through some pages. I landed in page 16.
'September 1, 2015
Dear Diary'
It's too hard. It's been 4 months since mom died. Aunt Mitsuki offered me to live with them but I decline. I'm too much of a bother. I wonder how she's doing in heaven. School has been terrible. Kaachan still makes fun of me Even though he knows the situation I'm in. The voices have been getting stronger. They tell me to do certain stuff. I actually did a lot of them. Will I ever be happy in this hopeless world? Probably not. But I'll hope for it. Just not today.'
Wow. That was... I flipped to another page.
October 31, 2015
Dear Diary'
I cut again. I can't stop. It just takes away the pain. I made sure to there long sleeves with my Halloween costume. But I which what Kaachan said was true. I dressed up as a ghost and kaachan said "Oh look. You finally died." And all his friends laughed. I wanted to die too kaachan. The voices... I can't I can't... I CAN'T
' scribble'
Why can't I be happy again? It's hurting Everytime I put on a fake smile or fake laugh. Everyone thinks I'm happy but that's a lie.
I just want it to end. JUST END ME ALREADY!!!
Do I dare read another page? I have to. I need to know more about... I flipped more pages but they just had scribble on it saying end me or it's fake. I found 1 new paper.
May 19, 2018
Dear Diary'
So... I haven't been written in this notebook for a while. So I got into U.A, our teacher is... Okay and I might have a crush on someone. Though I already know that he won't like me. He's probably not even gay. He probably likes Momo. She's more smarter and beautiful.
'blood stains'
I've been thinking alot about the cutting. I have tried to stop it but they tell me to do it. They tell me that I need to do it.
'blood stains'
I almost ended it today. I tried to overdose myself but something stopped me. Well someone stopped me. I also tried to let myself bleed to death by cutting but I couldn't find my razor. That will be it for today.
Sincerely me
What did I just read? I had so many questions. Like who's Mitsuki, why were there blood stains on the page and what voices? I put the book in disbelief. "Ugh" Huh? What was that noise? " Agh." There it is again- *THUMP* what the. It came from the... Bath... Room. I ran twords the bathroom only to see that it's locked. "Midoriya open the door!" No answer. "Midoriya!" No answer again. I stepped back. " Midoriya I'm going to kick the door down. Step back." I run to the door and kicked it down. I look for Midoriya only to find him on the floor passed out with blood everywhere. "What the- Midoriya!" I ran to him in fear. I looked around and found a knife and bandages on the floor. I checked his arms to find 1 big gash on his arm and it was really deep. I grabbed my phone and dialed 911. "911 what's your emergency?" " My-my friend he cut himself. He's bleeding. There's a huge gask on his arm come quick." "Okay. Help is on the way. Just stay calm " Calm!? I can't be calm right now. "T-Todo?" I looked to see Midoriya eyes half closed. "I- I'm very s-sleepy." "No no no no no. Stay awake just a little longer. Come on. Please." "I'm sorry..." "M-Midoriya? Midoriya wake up!" He didn't wake up "Izuku. Izuku! IZUKU!" I heard sirens outside. Their here.
A/N: No deku is not dead and neither am I. Sorry I haven't been posting. School is horrible and it's stressful. I've already had 3 panic and anxiety attacks. But my friend was there to help me so that's that. I hope you have a wonderful day.😄 Also the song Inko was singing was hold on just a little while longer. So check that out.
YOU ARE READING
don't worry (suicidal! Deku x Todoroki)
FanfictionDeku has been depressed since his mother, Inko, died when he was little. He starts accept the fact that he's worthless in this hell people call earth. What will happen if Todoroki gets involved. this is my first story so it will probably be a little...
