𝚜𝚑𝚎'𝚜 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 || mileven au

fiancèe

Chapter Song: Maybe You Miss Me - Jess Benko

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El slumped into her seat, hoping no one in the coffee shop would notice the tears streaming down her cheeks.

Engaged?

She may have acted happy for him, but deep down she knew what she really felt. Regret. The urge to fight her romantic scenarios had weakened and she found herself stuck in a trance.

Stop it El. You had your chance...

and you blew it.

She grabbed her backpack and walked out of the shop. She took the bus back to her little apartment off of Yule St. Unlocking her door she could hear the sound of the party next door. Her neighbor, Beverly was known to be a big party animal.

Bev and El were pretty close, despite they're differences. El found her to be the only person in LA who actually seemed real. They said hi to each other on their way to work and on the occasion enjoyed a Sunday morning brunch together to discuss whatever drama went on in Bev's life. She never showed it, but El envied Beverly. Her life was exactly what she had imagined herself living when she moved to LA. Instead she was stuck working at a bar on the bad side of town, doing constant auditions that never went anywhere, and had no social life.

She set her keys down on the counter and reached for a drink in her fridge. Empty. The bass from Bev's apartment vibrated through her feet.

Bev used to always invite El to her parties but eventually gave up when El always turned her down.

But for the first time, El had an urge to go. To feel the rhythm drown out the overwhelming emotions she felt from the day. She needed to do this for herself. Just for one night.

Adding a touch of glam to her face and neon crop-top she had living in the back of her closet, she playfully strode out of her apartment and knocked on Bev's door.

The door opened slowly with a very stoned-looking Bev. Her eyes lit up to see El standing stiffly in the doorway.

"El?...El! Are you here to party or complain about the noise?"
"...uhm. Well actually Bev I wanted to-"
"Who's this lovely lady?!" A tall boy came up behind Beverly and kissed her on the cheek.
"This is El! El, Ben, Ben, El. She lives next door babe."
"Ah sickkk. I hope you're here to rock out!"

The couple guided her into the crowded apartment and the aroma of cheap perfume and weed filled her nose and caused her lungs to pump slower, as if to match the beat of the song. A disco ball in the corner cast colorful light beams across shadowy faces in the dark. Always Forever by Cults blared through the walls of the apartment.

Bev and Ben sat down on a couch next to three boys who laughed in synchronization with spiked punch in their hands. Bev handed her a mysterious drink and El had the urge to guzzle it.

When she was finished, she disappeared into the crowd away from Bev and found herself in the trance of the song. She made eye contact with a light haired boy who seemed to be dancing harder than anyone. He gave her a smirk that sent a chill of energy through her bones.

She saw her feet moving, and eventually the two of them began flare around like blades of grass in the wind. Throwing their heads back in laughter at each other.

The breathes of others' in her lungs, the bass vibrating through her skin.

There she was.

Baptizing in her own perspiration. This was the moment she could let go.

Let go of him.

Until a hand pulled her away. She was yanked back to the couch where she could see it was Bev who had drawn her away.

"You snuck away from me! I wanted you to meet my friends."
"O-oh. Yeah, sorry."
"Well this is Stanley, Bill, Mike, Eddie, annnd over there is Richie."

Bev pointed to a curly haired boy proudly performing the moon walk a couple feet away near the disco ball. He was wasted. Bev yelled his name and he turned around. El's heart stopped. No one had ever reminded her more of Mike. His deep eyes locked with her's. El's ecstasy had worn off and seeing Mike's lookalike had brought her an unexpected feeling of dread inside.

She felt sick to stomach and she dropped to the floor.

And her sight went black.

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Mike drove down the freeway with an unfamiliar numbness in his soul. HIs thoughts and memories of El overwhelmed him. Had he made the wrong choice moving on? She was the one who left. Did he give up too soon? He turned on the radio to drown out the noise in his head. I Know It's Over by The Smiths played eerily through his burnt out speakers. He remembered the late nights with the gang that were spent in this car. Driving through the forest paths playing their favorite songs. Max sitting on Lucas's lap staring out the window giggling, Dustin and Will screaming the lyrics out the window, and El sitting in the passenger's seat quiet and still. Anyone besides them would have seen El as a party pooper or a wet blanket during nights like these. But they knew she was having the most fun. She had her head out the window and the cool, summer night breeze flowing through her thick, dark, hair. He would watch her close her eyes and take in all the details of the night.

This was her family, her home. She would look up at Mike with such adoring eyes and think to herself,

I'm out of that horrible place, and now I'm with him. He's everything to me.

Mike snapped out of his memories and felt the tears fall down his cheeks. He just wanted that again. And now his friends were gone, and so was El. He was going to call her. He was going to find her. He had another chance.

If she said yes he could have it all back. His friends would come back, the life he always wanted with her could be his. He had to call her. He knew he could find her number again. He sped towards his apartment with the image of her from that night in his head.

He fiddled with his keys and opened the door. But his thoughts of El quickly disintegrated in his mind when he heard the familiar voice coming from his kitchen.

"I can't wait to tell him mom! —oh! He's home, I gotta go. Love you."

Mike stumbled to the kitchen and smelled the cooked roast coming from the stove. There she was. His fiancée.

"Hi baby! You're home late! I decided I would come by here and surprise you with some dinner."

"G-grace! Hi."

"Well go ahead and have a seat honey I'm just setting us up. I'm sure you had a long day of errands."

Mike slowly sat down in the dining room and the thoughts of El began to sink back in.

He was engaged. He could never call her.

Mike you're horrible. You're engaged to sweetest, most beautiful, girl you could imagine and you're letting yourself think about her again?!

Grace was beautiful and sweet and everything a man like him could ask for. But why wasn't he satisfied all of the sudden? There she stood in all of her blonde, fair-toned, elegance. Grace Jansen was a dream. But not his dream.

Fate was testing him once again. He just wanted to go back.