INFATUATED

Monday II

Emanuel

Dear diary,

today was the first day of school in my new town. I'm still angry with my dad for moving here, I really liked our previous home - but dad thought there were too many memories of mom lingering in the air and he was tired of inhaling them and coughing them out again. The memories were suffocating him, but they blew life in me. I'm not happy here but neither was I happy there. I don't think I'll ever be fully happy - I'll keep living with one eye closed trying to see the good in things but unfortunately, I closed the wrong eye and I only see the madness.

The last lesson in school today was the best lesson, it was English. There sat a shy guy next to me, he was tall and had brown curly hair. I think his name was Phoenix. I saw him after school walking toward the book shop - to me it looked like he hadn't any friends besides the books that were probably resting on a shelf in his room. He looked sad or maybe I confused sad with lonely since everything looks sad to me.

"How was school today?" Dad asks as I throw my backpack in the corner of the kitchen. "Like you care." I answer without showing any emotions. "Have you been taking you antidepressants lately?" he questions and I think about all the pills I taped under my closet so he wouldn't find them. "Again; like you care." I roll my eyes and walk over to the fridge. "You can't stay mad at me forever for moving here." he says as he takes off his glasses and puts down the paper he was reading. "Whatever, dad. I'm out." I say after I took an apple and closed the fridge.

It was pretty dark outside since it was just five pm. Red and brown leaves coloured the grey street. There was a cold Northern wind. I should've put on my scarf. I threw away the apple - I only bit once but it was enough to feel like I ate too much - in Mrs. Stones garden.
---
i'll update later, i'm too sad rn, sorry