Dark Days

The birds

She fought through the days, though it was harder now that she had accepted the fact that him, her true love, was gone. She would see things that would remind her of the days she missed, the cherished memories she wished she could revisit. Everywhere she would go a memory would arise, from the ivory colored pages of his favorite books to the scent of the ever so warm fire they would sit next to together, holding each other. It felt as though those memories were so real that they were actually happening, but she would always find herself falling out of her trances of recollection. She held herself near the fire, never quite getting that same warm feeling she always got in the same spot with him. The warm tears of her sadness fell onto her lap most nights, as she could never feel that same way.

She revisits all the places they went, always ending at the make-shift lounge they shared with each other and nature. She found it the way they last left it, the last day of their perfect feeling. She would sit in the same spot, looking up in the night sky. As the constellations shined through the dark of the night sky, as they started to blend and blur through the sea of sadness that started to flow from her arctic blue eyes, surrounding the sprouting sea green at the center. She wiped her tears away and looked back up at the stars, admiring them with her own galaxy withheld in her gleaming eyes. A final tear fell before she pulled a flower to her nose. Lily of the Valley, the flowers he always brought her because he knew the smell warmed her heart. It seemed like the only piece of him she could bring with her, the only thing left to connect her with him. Her eyes closed slowly, shutting her out of the real world and immersing her into the world she preferred, the one she could explore and search for him. As she started to dose off, smelling the sweetness of the flower she held as her world was shifting to her own, she heard the most faint cry of a cardinal in the far distance. Its cry was calling to her. Before she could look, the world shut around her.

The sound of the cardinal remained as she floated in the vast ocean of darkness surrounding her. She looked around, trying to see where the cardinals calls were coming from. She couldn't see anything, no matter how close she thought she was to figuring out the direction of them. Suddenly, she felt a pull. It felt as though something inside her was tied to a rope and being tugged, but not a physical part of her. It felt almost like what she used to feel, what she felt with him. The pull became harder, and she floated with it. As it carried her along, a world around her was being made. It was a galaxy in the color of her eyes, the frozen globes that always flooded at the thought of him. She was floating in the tears of her sadness, being pulled through by a feeling she most yearned for. The more she floated in the direction of the tugs, the warmer her heart became, the more sensations she had missed so much ever so slowly started flowing back into her spreading from her chest. She saw through the ice and sea a color that was warm, and stuck out. She squinted, the aura reflecting off of her shimmering eyes. She recognized the color, the feeling it gave her. She reached out to the colors as her galactic eyes released a milky-way tear. Reaching for the feelings she missed, reaching for the golden gates that held the brown forest of him, reaching for the one she missed more than she would life itself. "Quincy..."

She managed to just barely get his name out, her voice holding all the sounds of her emotions in that moment. She saw the colors expand as she got closer and closer. She was just about to reach it, things started to feel just as they used to, she could feel the nice warmth of his presence, she remembered that bitter morning breeze they would feel in the mornings, the vanilla smell of their home, the sun shining over the water and over the trees and fields. The memories of the stars, the fires, all the memories and feelings hit her. She reached her hand out, and saw a hand coming from inside the golden aura. They both reached and reached, and they were just about to touch, before the cry of a raven was heard. She turned to the noise and was met with a horrid sight. The feelings all drained so quickly she couldn't react, the aura seemingly disappearing and the hand no longer able to be seen. She watched as a flock of ravens all below in the vast space of nothingness. They carried a limp figure. It was Quincy. She tried to get to him, the world around her starting to flood as her eyes filled with cold tears. The crows were too fast, and she was left in her world all alone, watching as the crows flew away. One looked back at her with bloody, crimson eyes before returning with the flock.

She floated all alone and in silence, her universe still drowned as her eyes did the same. It felt like she was starting to fall, and before she knew it she picked up speed. Her speed kept increasing, the sharp winds scratching at her clothes and stinging her skin. She let out a scream before she woke up in a cold sweat. She looked at her surroundings, still outside in the nature lounge. She let out a deep breath as she realized it was just a dream. She wiped her tears, seeming to have cried in her sleep. She felt odd, like something was off. She looked down at herself, and found her outfit torn just as it had been in the dream. She felt a warmth spreading from her under arm. Her hand caressed her side, and sure enough, she was bleeding from what seemed to be a cut. She was shocked and didn't know what to think. Was it all real? Had it all actually happened?