An Illusion Of Love

Chapter I

Lenora's P.O.V

A shooting pain erupts through my hand as I complete the final page of the life-draining biochemistry assignment. The pen once filled with ink is empty, much like my current energy level. I carefully insert each written paper into one of my many plastic binder pockets, putting the binder in my backpack, ready to hand in, in three days' time. 

I throw myself onto the small bed in the corner of my room sighing deeply while shaking my sore hand to ease the discomfort, attempting to drown myself in the thoughts of anything but home as I wait for my roommate's arrival. However, it is all that consumes me. 

The stress of completing tasks, assignments, and graduating university with flying colours and a doctoral degree would be nonexistent if my parents hadn't drilled the idea of success into my head.  

Unlike most teens who would rather party, drink and have sex, I was taught to like books, studying and late nights in the library. My transition to university opened me up to a small portion of the world I had been missing. 

Only more chaotic.

I had attended my first party within the first week of university in which I met the majority of my friends. As well as attending a party, I had given myself away to a one night stand while drunk, leaving me to quickly regret the idea of that party. 

I was never emotionally attached to my virginity, and I didn't want to wait until marriage to experience sex. But I had always wanted to give it away to someone I love and trust. And for it to be a memorable experience. Not done with a sleazy, drunk, party goer. 

What is done, is done and there is no possible way of getting it back. However if word somehow got around to my parents that I attended a party and had sex as soon as I left home, there is no doubt that they would have strokes.

Disintegrating my train of thought is the dorm room handle violently rattling. I jump out of bed unlocking the door, allowing my roommate to enter. Dakota Adams, otherwise known as my closest friend.   

Her beauty shone brightly from within, blinding all people who come into contact with her. Her long dirty blonde hair complements her shining green irises, rimmed by darker green. Her small figure sported a blue and green flannel tucked into a pair of bootcut jeans. She kicks off her doc martens placing them by the door and sighs, flopping onto her bed. 

I wordlessly follow her, anticipating her grumble of the day as I sit on my bed opposite hers. "Heather kissed me," she quietly says, nervously fiddling with her hands in her lap. My jaw drops, hanging low to her words.

"What!" I exclaim removing myself from my bed, rushing to her side, pulling her into my arms.

"She looked at me as if we were on the same boat. She gave me that look, one where you silently conversate, and then somewhere in our sea of silence, a kiss washed over us I guess, " Dakota shakily breaths while sadly laughs "It was a near-perfect kiss. I... loved it in all honesty. Then it just so happened that Nicola was walking past," I feel her whole body tremble in my arms. 

God this isn't good. 

"You don't have to say anything if you aren't ready," I reassure her, comfortingly rubbing her arm. 

"I'm going to say it," Dakota strongly announces, still shaking in my grasp, "Thankfully we had pulled away by the time Nicola walked by, but Heather... she just..." she breaks down, sobbing hysterically while wetting my t-shirt with hot tears. 

Dakota is a strong woman, and not once in the two years I have been attending the University of Toronto, have I seen her cry. A genuine smile is always plastered on her face and she holds pride in her words. 

"S-she yelled in my f-face, calling me a d-dirty lesbian rat and telling me to k-kill myself, shrieking and r-rubbing her lips clean of my lip gloss. She o-outed me to Nicola," she stutters between her gutwrenching sobs. All I see is red, as I hear her recount the bullshit pain she just went through. "I didn't mean to be born broken. I didn't mean to be lesbian," Dakota cries further. 

"Nic spat on me and laughed as I walked away from them. I was supposed to run my errands but fuck that, right?" she sadly laughs again. "Heather made me feel complete, you know. Everything about her is reflected in me and vice versa."

"Dakota listen to me. You aren't broken, I am absolutely sure of that. There is nothing I can say, that will ease the pain of what Heather did to you, I know you love her. As for Nic, she has no backbone, and she will follow whatever Heather or any of the other girls say. We both know this. And Heather is not reflected in you. You are perfect, compassionate, my sunshine. If Heather was like that, I would love her just as much as I do you, okay?" I say, holding her closer to me.

As she drifts off to sleep, I hear her softly mumble, "The world needs more Lenora's." I lightly chuckle at her words, standing up from her bed tucking her in and adjusting her pillow then walk into our ensuite. 

I stare into the mirror, judging my imperfect face and exhale heavily. The tip of my nose is round and button-shaped, creating the illusion that I am five rather than twenty. The pimples randomly dotted on my face, grow redder and bigger by the second. My dull brown eyes lost their shine long ago and my thick straight brown hair falls past my shoulders. 

Downing coffee's and sitting down doing assignments and studying added a few pounds to my figure. My breasts are abnormally large, considering the lack of boobs from both sides of the family. 

I decide to stop criticizing my body for the day and reach for the medicine cabinet, grasping a small orange bottle of rattling white pills. I twist the bottle open and pop three pills in my hand. Once done, I seal the bottle shut, and put the bottle back in the cabinet closing it carefully.

I tilt my head backward, parting my lips and fixate my gaze on the chipping paint on the ceiling while dropping each anti-depressant into my mouth, one by one. My saliva washes them down, rather than the usual glass of water I drink along with my pills.

My feet trudge tiredly to my bed, and I curl up in the sheets, dreaming of saddened girls and complete assignments. 

Hello readers! Thank you for reading. Just for your information, this book is written by two authors alternating each chapter. This chapter is written by...   

rachellogan268 

Thank you for reading :)))