Shattered Smiles (A Choni Story)

Chapter 13

"Let's go."
Cheryl's POV
Toni and I head inside the trailer after she calmed me down from my mini breakdown.
I quietly follow her in and plop on the couch.
I've haven't really done anything but cry today and I'm already exhausted. I'm just ready for this day to end and be over with. I could use an 8 hour break from the world and be woken up with the sun hurting my eyes without being bothered by it, literally anything seems better than staying awake right now.
I lay on my side and just close my eyes, allowing their staring eyes not to bother me any longer and the hushed talking to fade away and blend into silence.
My eyelids slowly close and everything goes black.

Sweet Pea's POV
"Welp, she's asleep," I say.
"No shit, you can hear her snore," Veronica fires back.
"Can you two not argue over my girlfriend sleeping?" Toni says with a scary mother scolding child-like tone.
"Sorry, Toni."
"You're fine, just go do something else without being dumb and hurting yourself."
"I'll go sleep." I tell her and start walking towards the other side of the couch that is untouched by Cheryl.
"You know you can sleep in your own room, right?" She asks.
"Oh yeah, of course I knew that," I turn around and start walking to my bedroom until I stop, "Wait, wouldn't I be invading your space?"
"Cheryl and I are just sleeping in there, don't worry, you can go in your room," She reassures me.
"Ok then, I'll be sleeping since you don't want me doing anything dumb and I'm pure stupidity," I announce and go into my room.
I recklessly throw myself onto my bed, allowing my eyes to close and everything around me to go dark.

Veronica's POV
Now that the other two have gone to sleep, I figure now is the right time to talk with Toni about what went down at Thistle House.
"Toni," I started, "Let's sit down at the table."
She shot me a confused expression but followed me to the table and copied my actions of pulling out and sitting in one of Sweet Pea's cheap wooden chairs, anyway.
"So, Toni, when I went to go pick up Cheryl's things, I noticed her bedroom was destroyed. Can you explain to me what happened to her bedroom?" I didn't need her to admit to me what role she played in the situation because I know exactly what happened in Thistle House.
Penelope didn't go crazy and start wrecking things, no it's something else. That something else, more like someone else, is Toni. Toni happened.
Of course after my words, Toni stops nervously fidgeting and just stay completely still.  Completely silent. She's paralyzed. She's not even doing anything other than looking down at the small table but before she started looking down, I was able to see a glint of guilt in her eyes. She looked sorry and embarrassed. Her cheeks were a really light shade of red so it wasn't hard to miss but it was exactly what I was looking for because it was hinting to the idea that something was eating away at her. That's how I knew I wasn't just assuming, I was correct.
"Toni. What did you do in Thistle House? What did you do?" I sighed.
I wasn't mad or disappointed with Toni. I don't know her past but I know she's had it rough and I have no right to judge her for behaviors she can't control just because I'm not able to understand them.
Toni never answers my question. She just sits there, looking at the table, in her own bubble of self pity and sorrow.
"Ok, look, I'm not upset with you. And I have no right to even think of being slightly disappointed in you. I know what happened in that bedroom without you explaining it to me so you don't have to admit to it but you do have to tell me why it happened." I reason with her.
"I got angry," She piped up, "I got really angry when I found out about Penelope. I wanted to punch the locker but it was of no use so I went home and had an outburst there. Everything I saw reminded me of Cheryl and how it was my fault that she was missing for two weeks." I look at her when she picked her head up and I notice that her eyes are welling up.
I go in for a hug to comfort her and Toni immediately sinks into it, crying lightly.
"I know this is hard on you. It's hard on all of us, especially you and Cheryl. But you've got other people staying here with you, Toni. It's not that you have to face the big-bad world alone and protect Cheryl because she's been wounded by it yet you're turning it into that. You can talk to Sweet Pea or me and we can help you. We're here for Cheryl but we are here to help you, too.  And I understand you were angry, you just have to explain that to Cheryl. She'll understand though. It's ok. Everything will be ok. We just have to fight and eventually we'll get through it, together. Not alone, not again." I try to soothe Toni by telling her this and rubbing her back but she seems to start crying a little more.
It's like I'm trying to convince two people here that we'll all walk out of this ok. Toni and me. If Toni's ever crying, the worlds gotta be ending because you'll almost never see her shed a tear. She's as tough as nails. If Toni is crying, something is really wrong. I mean obviously everything is really wrong but I thought it would get better eventually. Now, I'm not sure. Cheryl's way too off, Toni's messed up, I'm screwed with my family problems, Sweet Pea deals with his own baggage with absolutely no help. I mean, we are all kids with serious traumas but I always thought we could get through it.
Now, right now, I feel stuck.
I'm stuck in slow motion while all my friends are falling through trap doors leaving me unable to do anything to save them.
I'm stuck and everyone around me is falling.