Talk

3

It's been probably weeks since the last time I saw you. And I hate– and I mean H A T E this feeling but I miss seeing you.

I miss glancing at your direction. I miss feeling my face flush and my heart go doki doki because of just looking at you. I miss the fucking zoo in my stomach and now that I've seen you again, all the feelings came rushing back and I feel my cheeks hot again.

I tried crushie. I really, really tried to ignore you. But I can't stop my eyes from locking to your fucking beautiful, flawless face. I'm so hooked already. I can't stop feeling giddy and it hurts physically now ;–; WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!

Though you know? The things they describe in the stories are true. Because every time our eyes meet, all just– stop. It feels like I'm inside my bubble again and I think that I'm dreaming but no.

And every time that happens, I look away. Because honestly? I really can't stand the thought of staring at a person's face. I feel awkward then I'll feel embarrassed and I'll overthink my looks then I'll look at someone pretty then I'll get insecure y'know?

It's just sad to think that I'm way out of your league. But what can I do? You're just a crush.

Or are ya?

YIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIEIIEIE enebe teme ne.

Sometimes I'm just tired of just glancing and all that crap. I want to talk to you. Like– be close to you. But where do I get the strength and confidence?! T^T I'm too weak and shy and nervous and fidgety I can't even do a "wave" at you in Messenger.

Well, I never really expected you to talk to me even there. But when I saw you messaged me last week I was like–

WHOA THE SHIT IS HAPPENING

So ofc, being a curious bitch I am I checked your message and my face was like •—•

"PAREACT PO NG HART SA PICTURE THANKS~"

I'm really that hopeless, am I?

But ayoko kasing masyadong mag-expect. First of all, school mate mo lang ako. We're only clubmates as well and ka-strand lang kita. Second, small talks lamg ginawa natin. Third we're not even that close and lastly, why would you talk to someone as ugly as me? We're not even friends.

Seriously.

Anyway, there's really no reason to talk to me. Or kahit wave lang.

But I expect too much. Hindi ko talaga mapigilang maging ganyan kasi, the desire is strong and shit and other lovely dovy words I can't think and my attraction is– uggghhhhhh. Putya eh kahit nasa kabilang dulo ka lang ngayon ng canteen, kumakabog dibdib ko.

What should I do?

I hate feeling helpless.

Please.

What should I do?