Forbidden

Chapter 1 - Departure

Today wasn't exactly a good day. My husband said he had good news, what basically means bad news for me. He heard that there's a rich married man (who is now unaccompanied) that lives nearby. I'll have to do that again. Not today, though, since he said that I could start tomorrow if I needed time to prepare myself. He considered that a mercyful action.

But there's always a bright side on things (at least that's what people say), and today is no exception. I'll have a special visit tonight, and the one who's coming to visit me is one of the only people that care about me. It won't be hard for her to come over, since James is out, like always unless he wants to fuck me.

I putted Susan to bed and waited in my room until I saw a coral dress coming through the window.

 - Angie! You're here!

 - Hi Mary! How are you?

 - Huh, normal, I guess. I'm going to be busy for the next month.

 - Oh, Maria... You can't live like this. You have to be free from "James Reynolds"

 - Angelica, you know I can't. I've told you what he does when I don't do what he wants. And what he says he's gonna do if I keep disobeying. I need to keep my kid safe.

 - I know, I'm sorry. I just... Wished I could do something for you.

 -  Well, you're here for me now.

She smiled a little. To assure her that everything was okay, I pressed my lips on hers and touched her face, stopping my hand by grabbing her hair. After a while, we split, and I said:

 - It's ok.

I noticed that she didn't really believe my words, but she hugged me in answer.

Angelica is always being cautious to not abuse me in any ways. She said I've being abused too many times in my life and that I don't need any more of it, so she usually didn't kiss me without my initiative and never touched me without being sure I want her to. I always tell her she doesn't have to do this, but she doesn't listen to me.

 - Maria, I hate to say it, but... I'm afraid I'm leaving to London two months from now.

 - What?! Why?

 - My husband's family has a suspicious name around here. He wants to go.

 - But, two months? I'll only have one left with you.

 - I know. I didn't want to leave you, but I don't think I have a choice.

 - How am I supposed to get through this without you here?

 - Hey, it's not the end of the world. We can still write to each other. I know it's not the same thing, but you're a smart woman. You'll be fine.

How can she sound that confident about saying I'm smart and will be fine?

I felt tears forming in my eyes.

 - You're wrong! I mean, you're right about writing and about not being the same thing, but I won't be fine. I... I never am when you're not here. No. Not even when you're here. You make all that a little more bearable, 'cause I know after that I'm going to be able to hug you, kiss you... But I'm never okay.

At this point I was crying a lot. It seemed like Angelica started crying as well, but I wasn't sure. It's hard to see with a bunch of water in my eyes.

Then she hugged me.

 - I'm so sorry. I really wished I could do more for you, Mary.

By her voice she was definitely crying.

 - Don't be, it's not your fault. Sorry for blowing up like that, by the way.

 - That's not your fault either. It's not fair that you have to take this every time.

After that, we heard the clock, and realised that was already eleven p.m.

 - It's late, you should be going. James is probably only coming back in the morning, but we shouldn't take risks.

 - You're right. And John would probably want to know my whereabouts if I come back too late.

 - Bye, then.

 - Bye.

Once she left, I cried until fall asleep. I knew that nothing would be the same after Angie's departure.

***

It's still three a.m. when I hear a voice calling my name.

 - Maria!

I wake up against my will wanting to know why the heck he woke me up this time in the morning.

 - James, you're back. Weren't they good enough tonight?

 - You know me right? No, they weren't, and since you know how to do it better than them, I came to enjoy the last night with my wife before your next job.

Remember what I said before, in the second paragraph? Yeah, I was serious.

He looked at me as if there was something weird going on with my face, or whatever, but like, I just woke up, what was him expecting?

 - Maria, have you been crying? How are you supposed to seduce someone with your eyes like that?

 - Don't worry. the bags will be gone 'till tonight.

 - They better be.

And then he took all of his frustrations with those other woman on me. Like always.

Angelica is right. I can't live like his anymore.