A Sketch Of A Physical Memory

If someone would have asked her, Clary would have had to admit that she had tons of sketches of Jace sleeping. Probably more of them than anything else if she was completely honest. But there was something special about the light this morning that fell through the large windows of the master bedroom at Herondale Manor. 

So she grabbed her sketchbook and sat down on an armchair at the wall. Clary couldn't help but to smile at the sleeping form of Jace. It still appeared a bit surreal to her that she would get to call him her husband in a few weeks. During the past few days she had thought a lot about their relationship and how far they had come when she had started to write her wedding vow. 

Clary still remembered it like it had been yesterday when they had first run into each other. She could recall as clear as day how confused but also fascinated she had been by him. As scared as she was after being attacked by a Ravener Demon, it held some odd comfort how carefully Jace had been checking on her. It still struck her how he despite his obvious cocky arrogance had been patient and caring with her. In hindsight Clary couldn't help but think how contradicting his behavior often seemed to her on the surface but with time she learned how vulnerable Jace was and where it came from. 

Within the span of nearly two years both of them had matured and grown mostly through the pain which had been inflicted on them. By times Clary would have never expected them to get this far. Considering what they went through and how often they had lost each other, she was definitely thankful for every morning they could wake up in peace.

Clary sighed, trying to push away the thought, she wasn't as far with her wedding vow as she would have liked to be. She hadn't kept count on how many sheets of paper had ended crumpled up in the trash bin during the past few days. And it didn't become much easier as people around her continued to tell her how romantic they already expected it to be. That was one of the reasons they spent a lot of their spare time here at the mansion. No one here was bothering them about the wedding preparations and they were free to enjoy themselves.

But it just took one look at her sleeping fiance to lighten up her mood. Sometimes she caught herself thinking how unfair it was that Jace never seemed to have a moment in which he didn't look gorgeous to her. It was somehow infuriating how a single person could look that good especially when she thought how often she looked like a train wreck in her opinion. 

Clary had no problem to admit that from the moment on she had met Jace, he was one of the most handsome guys she had ever seen. But the more she got to know him, he became truly beautiful to her. She loved how his vulnerability shone through, when he let his guarding walls down. 

Sometimes it felt for her like her heart couldn't take the intensity of her love for Jace, like it would burst under the weight of it. She knew she would never forget the cold fist of pain around her heart when she had seen him die or when she had to leave him and all of her loved ones behind. 

She had always considered herself as a rather snuggly person but ever since she had been with Jace, it had become quite an addictive habit to sleep with her head on his chest to hear his heartbeat. It made her feel safe and connected with him. 

Looking at him now Clary felt like her heart would burst with the love she had for him. As tempting as it was to crawl back into bed to snuggle up to him, the urge to draw him once again was overwhelming. She wished, she could have stopped time to stay as long as she liked in this moment. 

Jace was still asleep, some strands of his blonde hair were falling into his face. The incoming sunlight let his features appear a bit softer than usual. The peaceful expression on his face with the slightest of smiles was something Clary would never become tired of.