I'll Die Without You (nolou fanfiction)

2. denial

Lou's POV

I woke due to the bright sun beam hitting my face. I remembered what I did so vividly but I thought it was a idiotic mistake I made. I brushed my teeth & heard the tv on downstairs & made my way downstairs & walked past nolan who was glued to the tv & grabbed my book & read for a bit until nolan looked over at me. I didn't look back at him due to still being upset. "Why did you do that?" Nolan asked as he shifted close to me as I still didn't pay attention to him "Did what?" I asked confusedly still keeping my eyes on my book "Why did you kiss me while I was asleep?" Nolan asked & I finally looked up at nolan & put my book down feeling my heart race.

I wanted explain what happened but I knew it would make me look stupid "I don't know what your talking about" I nervously denied it as I felt my heart beat fast. Nolan became quiet & huffed in frustration. We stood in silence  for hours. I layed on the couch, stoned faced & proceeded to read my book.

Nolan grabbed me by the shirt & roughly pushed me on the floor & harshly thrusted my shoulders on the couch & caught a glimpse of his angry face "Your a goddamn liar. I know you fucking kissed me whether you deny it or not" He scolded me, huffing his angry. "Ok but you don't have man handle me like that~". My face burned red & smirked softly, staring up & the brunette seemed more agitated but finally calmed down. He released my shoulders & got off of me, settling down beside me

"Just tell me the truth Lou. Did you kiss me or not?" Nolan firmly said. I could tell he was desperate for an so I sighed sharply "Yes I did. Happy now?" I claimed sarcastically. He cupped my face with both of his petite hands & looked into my face. I could see the look in his eye's that he felt something that I oddly felt. Our breathing began to get heavy for a odd reason & nolan gripped onto my shirt, resting my hand's on his feminine like waist. He brushed his lips against mine but didn't really kiss me. "Umm..I'm sorry. This is wrong & I can't do this" he quietly said, forcing my hand off of his waist & dashed to the bathroom.

Nolan's POV

I closed the bathroom door shut & sat quietly on the cold floor, trying to process what caused my actions towards lou. "Why did I just try to kiss him? It's not like I have something for him" I spoke quietly to myself. It felt right & the way his hand's felt on my waist felt pleasurable. I continue to talk to myself for a few minutes. It began to get to get late & I heard Lou wandered upstairs into his room. I realized that I've been in the bathroom for a bit & decided to head to the living room to sleep. I wandered upstairs to check up on lou to see that his bedroom door was halfway open. Curiosity got the best of me so I quietly snuck close to the door & peeked in the crack of the door

I caught a glimpse of lou removing his shirt & also caught a glimpse of his body which....looked stunning & breath taking. I decided to make a move & so I knocked quietly "Come in" he said. I walked in to see him bare chested which oddly made me feel excited. He stood in front of me with a confused look on his face. "I-I just came to check on you" I stuttered as my face flushed. I turned over to walk out of the room but felt lou gently grip my wrist.

I turned & faced him as he softly pulled me forward by my wrist as our bodies made contact. I felt this feeling that made me want to touch lou. He freed my wrist & gripped my other hand & raised then rested my hand on his chest. I felt his heart pounding & I could tell he felt the same the same way. He planted his lips mine, leaving me speechless. His lips were so soft. I wanted to stop him but I didn't. I oddly kissed him back but broke the kiss & turned my head downwards. He gripped my face softly & planted his lips on mine again except this time, it was rough & more passionate.

Lou's POV

I kissed nolan once again. I felt this tension between us that I helplessly craved. "Lou.....I can't do this" nolan claimed softly then broke the kiss. I cradled his petite body in my arms. Nolan softly shoved me away & I heard his voice start to break as he spoke "I'm sorry. I can't do this." Nolan said & started rushing towards the door. I rushed towards the door & slammed the door. He looked angry & annoyed & for some reason, I felt tears rolling down my cheeks

Nolans POV

I wrapped my arm's around him & broke down, sobbing as tears ran down my face I held lou close & I could feel his warm body against mine which made me feel oddly safe. He felt like home & a comfort for me. I felt like I could love him more than anything but I was oblivious but I  comforted the blonde for his sake. I wiped his tears away & stared into his eye's.

"Can you sleep with me?" Lou asked me with a soft sad tone as he gave me puppy dog eyes which was breath taking. That question took me by surprise & I couldn't say anything from the shock that overwhelming that I just nodded my head. Lou's face turned a soft shade of red as we both climbed into bed, covering ourselves with a soft, white blanket. We both laid 4 feet away from eachother since I didn't want to make this a weird for the two of us.

Lou's POV

I layed in bed with silence & stared out the window while feeling overwhelmed with my feelings for nolan which made me restless. I turned over to catch a glimpse of nolan, bare chested with his back facing me. I have no idea what happened but I suddenly scooted close to the brunette & wrapped my arm around his slim waist, feeling his body heat  which made me feel relaxed & secured. His body heat clouded up my eyes & made me drowsy & fell into slumber

I arouse around 5 a.m. & realized what I did was a horrible misunderstanding so I quietly got up & elevated the brunette off the bed & wandered downstairs & rested him on the couch & layed a blanket on top of him & wandered back upstairs. I climbed back into bed & layed in bed, questioning my foolish feeling & behavior towards nolan. While I was wrapped around my thoughts, I ended up falling dozing off & hoped that nolan has no memory of my actions

//*clears throat* THIS TOOK MONTHS TO FINISH//