Wavering Storms

thirty-eight

Edward’s tears freely let themselves slide off his face as he lowered his gaze. He tried to cover his crumbling appearance as his mate’s casket was being covered with earth.

He no longer felt normal. It was as if Henley took a giant slab of him when she slipped off his grasp. He was devastated.

Henley died trying to give birth to their son, along with the mother, their pup lost its life too.

Losing your partner was like dying. Only you were left to simmer in pure agony and pain, as you burn alive from the sympathetic gaze everyone threw your way. His head was hung as he looked down at his feet. He fought furiously to stop the betraying tears that fell to the ground from his blue sorrowful eyes. He walked away from it all, not meeting his packmate’s eyes.

“Edward…” He heard Alpha Jopheil call for him.

But he didn’t turn. He couldn’t bring himself to see the pitiful gaze his Alpha held. So he ran as fast as he can, hitting everything in his path. He wanted to do something. To get rid of the pain in his heart. The huge void she left would remain a hollow void forever.

Trees in his wake fell down the ground as he punched and pushed his way through the woods. He wanted to release everything in him.

“Henley!” he screamed in pain as tears continued to escape him. “Please, please, please.”

His hopeless cry for help could be heard miles away. But that didn’t matter to him. All that matters for him were Henley’s memories with him. Her very voice, her touch, kisses, and her grassy green eyes. Every single thing about her flashed before him.

He fell to his knees, shoving his face on the dirt beneath him, his hand form into fists as he continued to cry and muffle his pain.

Was crying the best option? A question popped into his mind.

He was lifeless until she came into his life. Once, he was a stranger in the North, but when she came and brought light with her, everything in his life changed as it suddenly gained meaning.

But now that she was gone, he had died a thousand times wishing she never came to him in the place.

“Maybe then I wouldn’t feel like this, Henley.” He stared into the cloudless sky. “This is all your fault. Why did you come to my life?”

Edward never believed in love, after all, he himself never loved who he was. But that all changed when Henley arrived.

The saying, you need to love yourself in order to love someone didn’t matter to him any longer. Because with Henley, he fell in love with her first and then loved himself.

His wolf howled in pain as he realized he had just blamed Henley.

“I’m sorry, Henley. Please help me. What am I supposed to do?” He cried.

His vision darkened. All he could think of was. The only way of escaping the agony he was dwelling in was to see his beloved mate.

“I’m coming Henley, wait for me.” He breathed hard, reaching for the silver blade from his back pocket. The silver burned within his gentle caress, his calloused fingers carelessly running across the blade in his hand.

‘Edward, are you sure?’ He heard his wolf murmur inside of him.

Was he sure? Another question popped into his head.

“I want to be sure, for her. I want to see her again. So bad.”

He placed the tip of the blade directly onto his throat. Breathing hard, he screamed, trying to will himself to drive the harbinger of his death through his neck.