We got you

Chapter 8

"Bucky? Hey, let me in." Steve stands in front of the soldier's bedroom. The door is closed and locked, and he waits patiently for an answer from the brunette. But Bucky is silent. No answer, not even a sound. Steve sighs, feeling anxiety creep up in him. He knocks again, this time with a bit more force than intended. He winces at his own impatience. "Bucky, please." It remains silent and Steve leans his forehead against the wooden door in defeat. His voice is just a silent, sad and defeated, pleading whisper. "Please. Don't lock me out. Let me help you." He closes his eyes, stands there for a second longer and just, as he makes up his mind to turn around and sit in the living room, he hears the click of the lock. His eyes fly open again, and he takes half a step back before he carefully lays a hand on the doorknob and opens it. He peeks inside. The room is dark, as dark as a room can be at day. The blackout blinds are drawn and shut out almost all light. A ball of blankets lies on the bed. Steve sees it shivering and shaking. He still can't hear a sound but that's not surprising for Bucky. He knows how to be impossible silent, that's what years with HYDRA trained him. Probably the only good thing if he has to choose. Besides being still alive of course. So, he steps in fully and closes the door despite no one being in their apartment, but he still does it to give Bucky the imagination of a secure surrounding. Carefully he sits down next to Bucky on the mattress and lays a careful hand on what he assumes is his back. "Talk to me." The bundle shivers again and shuffles a bit, turns around and then the brunettes head pokes out. His eyes are red rimmed and puffy. Steve can feel his heart drop. It's been a while since he saw Bucky cry and to see it now, after they went through so much, after he went through so much with HYDRA and all, it's just heartbreaking. "Will... Why..." Bucky shakes his head, unable to form at least one full sentence. Then he reaches out with his metal hand and takes Steve's in his, squeezing it just a bit too tight but Steve says nothing. Bucky guides the hand close to his chest. Not to plant it on his heart but just to feel its heat and to have an anchor that grounds him a bit. Steve looks down at his boyfriend before he extracts his hand from Bucky's grip, earning a whimper from him. He shoves Bucky a bit more into the middle of the bed and lies down himself. Quickly, he presses Bucky's front into his and hides the brunettes face in his chest while he embraces him into his arms. He feels his own silent tears at the brink of falling. "She'll make it. She'll wake up. Don't worry, Buck." He leans down and plants a kiss to the top of the brunette's head. "How do you know?"

"Because I saw it once. And this person became something beautiful. He's back in social life, he talks and shows what he feels. He is shy and adorable and the best this world can give and that, even though he suffered through things no one should live through. HYDRA didn't manage to destroy him." He plants a new kiss on the brunette's hair. "So, I know she can make it, because she's as strong as you are." He hears a choked sob from the man in his arms, so he hugs him a bit tighter. "And this is just a medical induced coma, Buck. It's to help her get better and to get the drugs out of her system without putting her though too much more. She survived until now. She's safe. No one will let her down now. Never." He feels Bucky nod and for a brief moment he closes his eyes. He's not really knowing who he tries to calm down. If it's really meant for Bucky to calm down his anxiety and give him comfort or if it's meant for himself to calm his own doubts and give him a bit of peace himself. They lay in silence. Just their breathing fills the room and is the only sound to hear. "How are you doing?" Bucky shrugs before he finally looks up at Steve again. "Not so good. You?" Steve shakes his head. He knows he doesn't need to say that he's not feeling great either because Bucky knows the moment he looks into his eyes. "We have to try to be strong. She'll need us when she wakes up." Bucky nods again before his eyes seem to cloud a bit and for a frightening second Steve thinks he might switch in Winter Soldier mode or something. A few blinks later he looks Steve into the eyes again. "We... I..." He sighs annoyed at his own lack to find the words to says what he wants to say. Steve gives him an encouraging smile and rubs his back. "I... I think I might ...like her?" Steve laughs and Bucky feels his cheeks heat up and for a moment he regrets that he said anything. "I like her, too, Buck. I would be surprised if here's one person that doesn't."