Fifty Shades of BLACK SILK

BLACK SILK: Part 37

I met Christian at the cinema. No car came to collect me. No driver. No rich boy sending me a white horse carriage with red interior and a well-dressed driver. I told Christian the only way this date was happening is if he didn't have a hand in designing it in any way. and for a guy that wants to control every last detail, that was severely difficult. But, doable. I underestimated his patience, and at least when I got to the theatre, he wasn't entirely pissed off.

In fact, when I got to the theatre, I found him in the bustling crowd almost instantly as the only guy wearing a two-piece suit. The ensemble was a dark blue; the shirt a shade lighter.

"What took you so long?" he asked.

I smiled. "Hello to you, too."

"What are we doing here?"

"Duh, we're going to watch a movie."

"What?" he seemed genuinely confused.

"You know, the silver screen, movie pictures, Charlie Chaplin—"

"So, we're not going to dinner or anything?"

I shrugged. "I don't know."

"So, you didn't book anything?"

I waved my cell phone. "I booked good seats."

"I thought we were going to talk not watch a rom-com or whatever."

"It's Parasite."

We made our way to our seats. "So, you don't want to talk?"

"Christian, you need to relax a little. Ease up. You're all—" I scanned his outfit— "two-piece-suity."

"I don't even know what that means."

"Just chill out and watch the movie with me."

He huffed and muttered lowly, "I would've taken you to paradise."

"Well I can't afford paradise. You're just going to have to settle on Parasite, instead. And maybe realise that not everything should be n your terms."

"I just want to give you the world."

"Have you ever thought that maybe I don't want the world?"

"Then what do you want?"

I smiled. "Shhh, it's starting."

Gladly, the movie was far from being romantic. Beyond excellent. Nothing I've ever seen, thankfully. I was sick of the same people, the same directors, and the same films winning the big awards at the Oscars. I'm glad I got a chance to see the film on the big screen.

And although we were staring at a big screen the entire time, I felt like all Christian did was think about me. He missed a whole ass incredible experience, for me. The date was lost on him and it kind of pissed me off.

After an evening of giving him the cold shoulder, he finally noticed and asked me what was wrong.

"You totally missed the movie," I said.

"That's what you're mad about?"

I shook my head. "Just forget it."

"I'll go re-watch it if it means that much to you."

"See, that, right there," I pointed at him, "that's what's pissing me off. This 'I'll do anything; I'll die for you' attitude. It's stifling."

I want you to love me not choke me.

He sighed. "I just–I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like whatever I do or say is going to miss the mark."

"If you weren't vying for me attention, what do you wish you could say?"

The waiter arrived with a bottle of wine. He popped the cork and poured us two glasses. Christian watched as the burgundy liquid glugged into our round glasses, and for the first time tonight it felt like he wasn't looking at me.

"I want to say..." he began once he and I both thanked the waiter as he left, "I'm really glad you chose to spend the night with me, and I really wish I paid attention to the film."

I chuckled. "Good start."

Christian paused before leaning forward. "Will you tell me something?"

"What?"

"What would you say if I told you I loved you?"

My heart skipped a beat. "Do you?"

"I don't want to waste anymore time trying to find the right time to say it so I'm saying it now," he said. "I love you."

I tried to keep my racing heart in check, but it built up with each word that fluttered out from his lips like petals in the wind.

"So? Say something," he chuckled.

"I'm kind of afraid."

"Of what?"

"Of loving you, too."

"But you already do?"

I nodded slowly. "I do."

"Say it."

I peered up through my lashes. "I love you," I breathed and then immediately looked away.

"I already knew you did," he said.

"Is that why you're saying it now? Because it's what I want to hear?"

He shook his head. "It's because it's what I want to hear. It's what I've been hearing the entire time we were apart. I love you, over and over again. And it hurts to think I couldn't give you that then, but I can now."

"Are you sure?" I asked, feeling stupid immediately after I asked.

He smiled a gentle, soft smile. A trait I hardly see from him. He held out his across the table and invited my hand in his. "Do you trust me?"

Just jump. Jump!

I laid my hand in his. "I do."