The Journey

Memories (Bear)

"Can we get a dog Mama?" the little girl asked, moments after she'd completed an aerial flippy twisty thing that all little girls seemedto do.

"No."

Anise didn't bother opening her eyes or raising her head from her comfortable position...
my lap, when she answered her daughter.

Said daughter's eyes hardened and I swear to God I could see her start to strategize right there in front of me, how she could best convince her mother to buy a dog.

She looked back at the fluff ball that had obviously brought about this new want.
Her lips pouted and she dropped to the grass, her arms folded and her face sulky.

I felt my lips twitch and I fought the smile trying to form on my face.

"Belle wants one too." She said wheedling.

Belle stopped her doodling and looked up into the identical face of her sister.

"No I don't," she said, then looked at her mother, "I want a kitten."

Anise kept her eyes closed and gave a quick smile.

"No."she repeated.

Belle sighed and returned to her sketchpad.

Lilise looked annoyed but determined, then focused her stare on me, and I knew what she was about to say.

"Bear, do you think we should be allowed to get a puppy?"

The hell I was answering that question.

And God help me... because I really wanted to find a place to hide.

Three pairs of identical brown eyes stared at me- awaiting my response. I could feel heat rising. It felt like my damned head was on fire.

Little beads of sweat were erupting from my forehead... and as much I wanted to, I couldn't blame it on the sunny day.

I cleared my throat.

"I don't think..." I said, shifting Anise out of my lap to start packing up the picnic.

I'll admit it...

...retreat was foremost on my mind.

"Please!" came another voice.

I looked down, some how Lilise wasn't sitting on the grass almost a foot away, but standing right there- beside me, her small soft hand in mine, looking up at me dolefully.

She smelt weakness.

She smelt my weakness.

Fuuuu

"I think..."

I started to say, I don't know what the heck else I was going to say, but then made the stupid mistake of looking down at Belle.

"Please Bear?" she said, so soft, so quiet, her lips pouted, her expression sullen, as if I refused, it would absolutely kill her dream.

Jesus...what was I supposed to do?
I couldn't be a dream killer.

My eyes shifted back to Anise and I can only imagine that my inside panic was all over my face, but she was no freakin' help... at all... she laid there on the grass looking unimaginably beautiful, with the sunkissing her skin like something from a movie; and she had that...

'let's see you get out of this one'

...look on her face.

That was the moment I knew that I was screwed, these three ladies could and would wrap me around their little fingers.

And I could do nothing to stop them.

I was in trouble.

I couldn't say No.
Maybe would never be able to when it came to them.

Shit!

There was a puppy and a kitten in our future.

Anise burst with her full-bodied laughter, as though her soul was made for nothing more than soaking up the joys of life.

I had to smile too.

*****

"Can I get you anything else Sir?... Sir?"

I looked down at the barista, I had a feeling she'd been trying to get my attention for a while.

So I pushed the memories back and shook my head.

"No thanks, that's all." I picked up the tray to leave.

She cocked her head to the side, pushed her chest out a little and smiled.

"You seemed miles away."

I smiled again and kept walking.

You have no idea, I thought... none at all.