Olivia's Thoughts
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I have a lot of great memories for a 14 and a half year old girl. But nothing beats holding my children for the first time. My beautiful baby girls. Kylee Ann and Casey Elise... And yes, their last name is Sage (Cams last name). They were perfect. They each had 10 fingers, 10 toes, 2 eyes, 2 ears, a mouth, and a nose. I made sure I checked twice too. Then I just held them. With their lil scrunched up faces lookin all adorable. They have me and my moms' smile and dimples. They have SOO much hair, probably from Cam'ron and my dad. When I saw the look on Cam's face when he first held the girls, I thought he would've had a heart attack from shock. "They're so tiny!... They're so cute!... God I love them!". That was his reaction. Drake was a little upset when I let my dad hold the girls before him, he'll get over it. My mom was crying. I don't know if they were happy tears or if she was crying because she was too young to be a grandma... Oh well.
Riley and Austin are gonna be great parents one day, they're both so good with the twins... Not anytime soon though, I don't want them to go through what I did. For some weird reason, Cams brother Travis left before he got to hold the girls... Maybe it was to getting to emotional for him. As Riley and Drake were putting a "Thing One" footsie on Kylee, mom was trying to teach how to breast feed Casey right. It was VERY awkward if you must know. But then...
Olivia-(breast feeding Casey) I think I got it!
Doctor-(coming in the room) Hi Olivia.. Friends and family... Well umm, we've ran the necessary tests on the twins and as you all know, earlier in the pregnancy, one baby was diagnosed with Toxoplasmosis. Kylee passed all her medical exams but it pains me to say that Casey failed the vision test... Needless to say, she was born fully blind... I'm so sorry. A nurse will come in soon and give you simple instructions on caring for an infant without sight. (leaves the room)
Olivia's Thoughts Again
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As the doctor left, the room grew uncomfortably silent. And I think I felt my heart sink to my stomache. I looked down at Casey who was struggling and squirming around to bring her mouth back to my chest for milk. Now I know why it was so hard to feed her... She didn't know what was happening, she didnt know where the milk was coming from because she couldn't see. And so she struggled. It made my heart to hurt to see that.
I pulled up my hospital gown to cover up my chest then brung Casey close to me as if letting her go would trigger the apocolypse. My mother tried to kiss my forehead and I didnt mean to be rude but I shooed her away and she whispered, "I'm so sorry baby.". Then she told everyone to leave the room and she left too. Cam stood there holding Kylee not knowing what words to use to express his feelings of utter apology and slight loss. I felt the same way. I didn't know how to raise 2 children but now one is blind...
Why do I feel like this is my fault? I couldn't stop the disease from claiming my daughter. But, as her mother, the one person she should trust and be loved and proteceted by like no other, I felt like I had failed her... But that wasn't all, I felt incomplete, lost, curious for more answers, sorry for my little baby who didn't desrve this. And I know you're not supposed to question God, but I couldn't help but turn my head up toward the ceiling and ask Him, "Why?". Why did this happen to her.
But maybe I should be thanking God for atleast one healthy baby. They say everything happens for a reason. But there's no reason for this little girl to be subjected to this kind of life! She was only an hour old, she was innocent.
This was supposed to be a very special day.... But it didn't feel like it.
OMG. HOW DOES THAT MAKE YOU GUYS FEEL??? AND POOR POOR LITTLE CASEY! BUT ATLEAST HER SISTER IS HEALTHY... BTW A PIC OF THE TWINS WILL BE POSTED NEXT CHAPTER, WHEN THEY'RE ONE WEEK OLD :)
-QUESTION OF THE DAY: DO YOU THINK CAM AND LIV SHOULD GET BACK TOGETHER, EVEN FOR THE BABIES????
-FUN FACT: EVER HAD ANY QUESTIONS FOR AUSTIN, OR ABOUT HIM??? LEAVE THEM IN THE COMMENTS THEY'LL GET ANSWERED IN THE NEXT CHAPTER. WE'LL CALL THIS: ASK AUSTIN LOL
