Stripped Bare

Feel Me

Note from poet - I know this is the title of a song and I do love the song but this poem isnt regarding the same meaning of the song. This poem is about breaking free from the hold of someone narcissistic and controlling. Of realizing I am more than just a piece, a pawn in anyone's game. That I have a voice and it doesn't matter what people state or expect or think about me stating  and voicing what I stand for. You do you, I do me.
Here goes...

Feel Me :-

There we go again
The moment I express my opinion
When it doesn't go with what you want
Do you really think
Most people think alike?
We aren't created perfect nor similar
Yet whenever we are about
To do something together in particular
You make it all about you
The way you want things done

My opinion solely never mattered
to you, someone I respected,
Who patched up our relationship
Every time you squandered it
Just to salvage your pride,
For you to come down!
Oh what a taboo that would be
Take the easy way out and expect
What was always expected of me
To bow down to you, cower, be meek
To depend on you when I had
no real reason to.

My choices are all mine.
I have no need, nay no room for fear
Of displeasing you or making a mistake
When for once in my life
I choose to differ
I choose to embrace myself what I want
No one gets  to control me.
Not now or ever
You can choose to accept that
Agree to disagree
We can move forward move past
Our difference in opinion

We live in a free land a world
Where women can express
their opinion without judgement
I won't judge you, your choices
are your concern, your business
You are accountable for them not me
My choices are mine solely.
My decisions are mine entirely
You do not get to decide them for me
You do not get to EXPECT of me.
What you do of good voluntarily
That was meant for me,
Is your choice entirely
If you hold your kindness over me
Filled with expectation
I do exactly as you want
You intentions are made clear

I exist only when you want
something of me.
When I differ from choice
You intentions are made clear
When I am left, abandoned
When I really needed an ear
To hear me out.
To feel me
To understand the anguish inside
But you showed me how much I meant
How much you valued, apreciated me
I gave you my all and you
gave me none
Nothing but a cold silence
Ignore me all you want.
This isn't  my home.
I don't  feel at home.
I am a boarder to you.
And you are lost to me.

So do not expect of me
My choices are my decision
I won't be making those mistakes
No expectations dependence
Nor assumptions that lead
to wrong conclusions.
Judgement is not for me to decide
Your actions are yours truly not mine
I wont be held accountable for them
Nor am I going to let
you make me feel guilty
Do not expect me to give up
what I stand for.
I'm  incredibly sorry
But I cannot make
my choices on what you desire

So leave it for now
If your intentions were to use me
They will be made clear
From your very own behaviour
Do not think you can blame me
For your mistakes
I am done blaming myself
Being your personal punch bag
For all your wrongful mistakes
Choicesfor which you
are responsible for.
Things won't  be normal
Even by some miracle
We do patch up and let things go
For you cannot break a plate
Say your sorry and still expect the plate to magically mend itself
Like you did not just break it.