everything is over. it's gone. i wish i can get him out of my mind but i keep having dreams about him. where we are friends or still together and it breaks me because i still remember them. how could i not? it hurts like hell knowing he's gone. he's really gone and i still can't believe it. he was the one i wanted to grow old with and do all these fun adventures with. i wanted to have a house with him. i could imagine us dancing in the kitchen wearing his long t shirts cooking breakfast. i really loved him. he was my first love. and i don't know. maybe we can fix shit but i really don't know. i don't want to wait but at the same time i do, but waiting is going to hurt me. i don't want to see him another girl. that would break me. them doing all the stuff we did. maybe she is going to be better then me. i'm just scared. and i don't know if i can find someone like him again. he kissed all my scars. made me feel i was the only one. he knew me. and when i tell you he knows me, he could read me like a book. i'm scared of not feeling that same way with another person just like jorge. i'm scared of getting hurt again. i'm sitting here looking through our old videos and pictures and i miss us. how happy we were. this jacket smells like him and it's killing me. i can still feel his touch. i can still feel his lips on mine. i can still feel him sitting in the passenger seat. i'm going to miss us holding hands together. i'm going to miss us cuddling, where i can just listen to his breathing and heartbeat. i'm going to miss us singing in the car, even if we sound terrible. most importantly, i'm going to miss his laughter. where his dimples pop out and his smile is big. i'm going to miss all of him.
YOU ARE READING
An Ocean Of Emotion
Poetryit never worked before, being away from you. because it is not easy for me to keep my distance i would risk falling apart because i am blinded by all the love i give you
