raven ↠ vikings

TWENTY-SIX

The next few days were oddly quiet. Ragnar became the new King ruling over all of Norway. No one questioned his new state of power. In fact, they embraced him. No one liked Horik much, but they kept their opinions to themselves. Now that Horik was dead, all the hate and bitterness towards him came out. Everyone seemed relieved that Ragnar had taken his place. I could sense something different about him, though. Maybe it was the burden of his new power. He seemed angrier and more driven. I hoped his mood would lighten as the days passed, but it never did. 

My mood wasn't the best either. The clock was ticking, and I knew I had to go back to England soon, but the more days I spent with Bjorn, the stronger my desire grew to stay. Even the thought of leaving made my heart ache in a brutal way. I couldn't even imagine how angry Bjorn would be if I told him I was leaving. I hadn't even told him about my real parents yet, or about Aella. I was tanged in a web of white lies that were building up every second. 

I thought about the revenge I wanted every day; on Aella, on the men that violated me as a kid, but now I also had Bjorn cluttering my mind. How could I make a decision? How could I leave everything I had in Kattegat; my home.

Ragnar's intuition caught on to my sad mood one day when we were sparring and he beat me too easily. He cocked his head to the side and threw down his sword, observing my distracted expression.

"What's wrong?" He asked. "You never let me win like that."

My chest felt so heavy from all the secrets I was keeping, so after weeks of hiding my unfortunate family tree from Ragnar, I decided to tell him the truth.

"When we were in England, I found out the truth about my parents," I said as I put my sword in its sheath. "I haven't told you because, well I guess telling someone makes it real, and I wish I could change it and go back to not knowing anything about my family." 

Ragnar nodded with understanding in his eyes, "You never have to be afraid to tell me something, Raven."

"I know," I sighed. "I just... I have this feeling that I've changed, and not in a good way."

Ragnar stepped forward. He put his hand on my shoulder in a comforting way, "I've known from the day I found you in Northumbria that there is darkness in your heart, but you've always been able to fight it."

"What if this is something I can't fight?" I asked. "What if this is something I can never come back from?"

"I'll always be here to pull you back," Ragnar gave me a slight grin. "I promise."

I took a deep breath, "Well, then the truth is..." I hesitated for a moment, "King Aella is my grandfather. He killed my mother for having me, and he's been trying to hunt down my father too."

Ragnar definitely wasn't expecting to hear that. He looked stunned; completely taken aback, "Who else knows this?"

"No one," I answered. Well, Ecbert knew, but I wasn't about to tell Ragnar about my secret solo alliance with Ecbert to assassinate Aella and his son.