Even though I didn't want to bother too much with the fact that she went out with another male, I repeat another male, I couldn't bring myself to peaceful sleep. I kept tossing and turning around despite the comfortable bedding.
I told her that it didn't matter and that I don't mind her hanging out with others but deep down I was more than jealous, I was super jealous.
The fact that I wasn't even going back to Korea but leaving to USA straight from Japan didn't contribute to the situation, it only made my heart feel more uneasy.
I assumed that we won't be able to meet until first award shows and that made me jump out of bed. That was almost a whole month without her!
I dug my fingers into the pillow furiously.
I wasn't jealous because I didn't believe or trust her, I was jealous because of people that could see her every day, that could talk to her, hold her and support her in her weakest moments.
I was jealous because I couldn't be there for her when she needs a shoulder to cry on and to think that spot would be taken by someone else made me even angrier.
I knew very well that I am not perfect regardless of all the bragging from our dear Armies, about the so-called Golden Maknae of BTS aka. Me. Maybe I could sing, rap, dance, play sports and draw well but there were things that our fans weren't familiar with. That was for instance my relationship with Lisa and the feelings I had towards her.
Because when it comes to the relationship I'm not as perfect as I would like to be. I start meaningless fights, I mess up frequently and I get jealous easily, but there are also things that I'm proud of. Even though I seem like a playboy to some, I don't play. I think that we can play with balls, dolls etc., but we shall never play with hearts.
They are way too vulnerable to be played with. Also, I try to give my best when I'm in relationship, I could do whatever it takes for someone I love and lastly, I'm very loyal.
That means that when I choose you, it's you and only you. My eyes only see you and my heart only beats for you.
Kookie! Are you sleeping? I feel asleep watching some movie and woke up just now, so I thought I would text you and then go back to bed. Are you alright? Your flight is tomorrow? Stay safe! I will watch the shows you will be appearing on regularly, so stay healthy and be back quickly!
I smiled. I loved that girl with my whole heart.
The days in USA passed quickly as we were fully booked. I enjoyed my time there, we performed and got interviewed many times, we also met with our dear armies.
Despite enjoying each and every day, I felt a great homesickness and you could only imagen my happiness when we landed back in Korea.
Where are you? I'm back.
It literally took her 5 seconds to reply to my text.
I'll be waiting for you.
YOU ARE READING
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Romance"So, Jungkook, do you still have my back?" A story about two idols, who are incredibly dedicated to their careers, but will they be willing to put everything on the line for the sake of love?
