she | ethma

18

emma:

struggling to find the perfect words, i place my pen back on the table and close the book. i'd come back to it later, i thought.

ethan and i moved in together, finally. it's been nearly 6 months and we are really happy together.

ethan's individual happiness has been a challenge to uplift since the exposure of kristina though. but it's a working progress.

sometimes i could hear faint cries from him in the shower or mumbles from him in his sleep.

'emma please don't be like her.'

it hurt me. i know he has major trust issues and has genuinely been completely abused and shattered by this one person but the person he is with now is completely different.

not to be cocky but kristina should of known from the get go she'd never be able to have ethan the way i have him.

she should of known she can't be me.

i knew it would be hard living with ethan and not everything would be perfect but as each day goes by, it's beginning to feel like it could go all perfect.

i'm not scared by it either.

i should be and i even wanna be just so i don't suffer if ethan and i go the wrong way but i can't help but indulge myself in this perfect thing we have going for us right now.

ethan and i just knew that things would be a lot more serious between us. this wasn't fun and games- we were very much a serious couple.

although ethan never asked me to be his girlfriend again, he calls me his girlfriend every chance he gets.

to waiters, friend, coworkers, it didn't matter. he felt lucky to have me. and that made me feel over the moon.

it makes me feel so special because he was never like that before.

the little emma inside of me is dying with joy.

the sex ethan and i have also endured since the big breakdown is insane, we fuck at least 2 times a day. whenever ethan gets sad he just wants to let it all out in that way, i let him. i always have.

i'm on the pill so don't worry, no babies but it's a hell of a lot of sex. especially considering he's so busy with work at the moment. he still manages to find the time to fuck me against the bathroom sink.

it's quite romantic.

but i thought maybe today's a nice day to get a coffee. it's raining here in italy and i can't help but smile at the faint rainbow in the sky.

ethan thought it would be perfect to move to italy due to my incredible love for the place. i'm so in love with everything here.

we've always wanted to be in italy together, grow old and have babies here.

i miss him so much, i hope he's a having a good day.

i worry about him a lot now and i can't lie when i say he's on my mind 24/7. ethan's very intelligent and if he doesn't want me to know something, i'm not gonna know about it. simple.

but putting on my light jacket and a slipping on my boots, i leave the house prepared for a hot coffee.

the sound of the italian accents flowing throughout the streets, people walking past and giving a smile and the incredible smell which i'll never get bored of.

i wouldn't mind feel all the intense senses i do right now for the rest of my life.

it's like everything in italy is more prominent. especially the smells. it's gorgeous. although it can be overwhelming.

walking a little bit faster to reach my favourite cafe, i enter and take of my coat.

"ciao emma, how are you today lovely girl?" marcia welcomes me.

she's rather old but very much young. she's alive and she's bold. and i love her.

"i'm okay thank you, the weather is a bit different today isn't it?" i giggle. it was so strange to be raining.

"oh il mio amore, bad weather means bad things." she tuts. already making me original order. i get it everytime.

"i don't believe in that sort of stuff. it's only true if you believe it. and i won't believe it." i cross my arms with a cheeky smile.

"oh why is that?" she smirks.

"because bad mindset means bad things." i raised my eyebrows.

"oh i suppose, how is that man of yours?" she smiles. "he's so cute. i hope he's doing well."

"he's fine. so busy lately. he's not texted me much today but that's work for ya." i smile small.

she places my warm coffee on a side plate and on the counter. i take my purse out of my bag.

"not today."

"why?" i laugh. i shake my head. "it's €3.20"

"not for you. it's free for you today." she smirks.

"marcia." i raised my eyebrows. warning her not to be silly.

"good mindset means good free coffee." she's shrugs and walks away to the kitchen behind her. "you have no choice, take it and enjoy it before it's cold." her thick accent a song to my ears.

smiling stupidly to myself and finding myself at my favourite table. right by the window. watching the world.

this is a perfect place to write.

getting the book from my bag and joining the pen to the book. my mind wandering off into a creative space for half an hour before i felt my phone buzzing.

grayson: I know you don't wanna talk to me. I get it Em. I respect your wishes but can you please check on Ethan, We were speaking and now he's not messaging back and I am worried. Thank you.

that's weird.

i called ethan's phone but no answer and he hasn't been texting me too. maybe he's driving.

i decided maybe it was best to go home and see if he's just asleep or something. "marcia, thank you so much for the coffee, great as always!"

"no thank you emma, you give that boy a big hug from me. tell him to come down tomorrow i've got a nice coffee ready for him." she folds her arms and smiles. her olive skin looking golden under the lights. her smile lighting up.

"i will. he will be too excited to say no!" i laugh. he loved this place too.

"bad weather might mean bad things emma but good things mean finding a nice colourful rainbow in a dark gloomy sky. look outside. today is your lucky day."

the rainbow hasn't disappeared. it's more colourful than ever. my heart feels so content. i look back at her giving her a huge smile before exiting.

leaving the shop quickly, i was no more in 2 minutes reaching home, unlocking the door and calling for ethan. "ethan? you home?"

i see no shoes at the door and the place is a immaculate. maybe he's still driving. i throw my bag on the kitchen counter aswell as my keys before my attention being brought to a note on the coffee table in the living room.

and my heart sank.

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1 chapter left. thank u guys so much!!

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