"DONT YOU WANT BE BABBAAYYY, DONT YOU WANT ME--OOOHH, OOHHH!!!!"
"Shut up."
"Wha-ah-aht-- Waht-e-ver," the idiot girl sings while bobbing her head in an alarming way, laughing her dumb laugh hysterically after.
I only close my eyes and breathe, trying to let the annoyance roll off me in shudders, before walking into the living room.
"Are you gonna fold your fucking laundry? Your coffee table is a cluttered fucking mess," I complain and grumble just because I can before slumping into her couch, allowing myself to relax.
I know I shouldn't be here, I know there are better things to do, but I don't want to face any responsibilities for awhile.
"Don't sass me," she says in a weird voice, waking into the living room with a bowl of cereal.
"It's not sass, it--"
"It better not be. Just dat ass and plain old class."
"S@ss ma$+er of Donc@st3r lol."
"What."
"Nevermind. What size bra is this?" I ask, holding up a pink lace bra she picked up earlier.
"Double-D, BEETCH!!!"
"36A," I frown.
"My boobs have feelings and you're hurting them," she snatches the bra from my hands too quickly and it slingshots into her face. "Ow, poop."
She rubs her face, and looks at her hand. "Am I bleeding?"
"No--"
"Keeeepp bleedin', keep keep bleeding, love!!"
"Shut the fuck up."
"Whatever. Hey, you wanna watch Keeping Up With The Kardashians?"
I look away from her bras and her dumb pale face with a new red stripe across it, and into the window with rain and wind and familiarity on the other side. I look back at her and shrug. "Sure."
a/n:
maybe this sucks, maybe it isn't as bad as I think it does.
maybe louis' cheekbones sliced the family ham this thanksgiving break, maybe they didn't.
maybe it's a pillow, maybe it's a pet.
maybe you bought four, maybe you're the devil.
maybe I am actually louis.
Things to Ponder.
--Harry Edward Styles. (•Inspirational Quotes 2014•™)
I'm annoying myself agahahahhah kill me✌️
YOU ARE READING
"shut up" "whatever" | l.t. au
Humora thief that's horribly clumsy and not at all very intimidating and the lazy, dim-witted girl that catches him or the one where two unlikely strangers spend their night on the couch eating cereal and talking about life.
