Soul of Yours

"To Me you are everything"

AJKidd04
toukalaki_neli
akht25
Gotham007
Alwa2005
TMNTLeo03
grumpygalaxy
user92807334
F4eddy_L1_3Z878

It's been awhile, and I thought I should finish what I started. I recommend playing the song while you read this.
All rights go to Nickelodeon.
They say that the pain of losing someone you love is unbearable and the most unthinkable thing in the world. Is it because of how your heart feels like it's on fire? Where you can't even put a bandage on it and kiss it better? I truly don't know the answers to it. My thoughts seem to dwindle and fade away as time goes by but that is the least of my concerns. Why do I care? About what if others get hurt and that makes me a bad person. What is the definition of a bad person? Good and bad doesn't really exist. People say it's black and white but isn't it more morally grey? If you have certain morals then I guess some things can be considered black and white. All things aside, I'm lost.

Being lost isn't the best feeling in the world. The best feeling in the world is when your lover holds you tight in their arms and says that everything's going to be okay. Well it's not. Everything is not okay. I have told myself multiple times and yet it seems I'm stuck planted right outside my hospital room. Silently waiting for him to leave so I could let the screams of my broken heart out and therefore not have to silence myself. If he could only leave just a tad faster everything would be much more better.

A confrontation was not what I needed. In fact, it was the last thing in the world that I wanted to do. Even the God of Death fears something. I was gasping for air like it was being dragged out of my lungs and marrow leaving my bones. That's gruesome you say but it's painful to say the least.

He's not leaving? Why? Doesn't he know that I'm gone? Doesn't he know that I don't want to be found? If I could go to him I would, it's just...not everything is what it seems and not everything is meant to have a happy ending. Like how those who desperately cling onto that; hope will either be beaten down or disappointed when it is achieved. That's how I see things. The dark and the depths.

The dark and the depths of my soul, and everyone else around me. The dark and the depths of this world. While he is full of everything good in the world, I am covered head to toe in everything bad in the world. Am I being dramatic? No, I'm being sensible. Sensible is this time of dire situations, where my life will affect the ones I call friends. "Friends" being a foreign concept to me years ago. It seems so long ago that Karai and I became friends, and oh, how will I explain this to her?

I won't. My problems, my responsibility. The enemy was out there, like always and I felt responsible for bringing her here. The enemy that I so desperately hate and wished would stay in the depths of my consciousness.

Sadly, life's psychedelic and likes to be a bitch. Boo hoo me. I know very well that  I can not bear to stand here and watch my heart continue to burn inside my chest. Wiping my tears I leapt over the fence biting my tongue. I didn't need to look back or I would feel that burning ember inside of me again.

Raindrops poured on top of me and cascaded down my long and wavy locks. As I pounced like a cat it grew challenging to look forward. The reason for it? The tears were getting mixed with the drops that slid off my face like I was porcelain. Which I'm not. I'm not like those porcelain girls whole are all perfect. Far from it.