I'm Sorry

Dead!

Gerard caught himself in a dream. He was laying on the side of a hill in a patch of tall greenish- blue grass looking out toward the sun-rise. He felt as light and soft as a quail's downy feather. He had never had this dream before, and he didn't want to leave. It was so peaceful there.

There was a knock on his door. He woke up still groggy from sleep. He fixed his hair and opened the door. It was his mom.

"Come downstairs," she said, "there's a bit of an issue."

Oh shit. "I'll be down in a minute."

Before we continue deeper into this hellhole, let's talk a little about Gerard. Gerard is a small and skinny kid, similar to his younger brother Mikey. He has black hair that covers his face. His face was always blank. He never talked much, not even to his own family, except for Mikey. Mikey is two years younger than Gerard. He is also a bit of a dramatic brat, who makes his older brother's life a living hell, but Gee loves him anyways, because after all Mikey is his only brother.

Gerard threw on whatever he could find in his dark, messy room. What the fuck does my alcoholic mother want today? Why was this the first time she has been serious since grandpa's death?

Gerard walked downstairs with dread growing in his stomach. He felt like he did something wrong again but forgot about it. He looks for his brother. Mikey's room is directly across from his, with a bathroom adjacent to the left of Gee's door frame.

Mikey's door is open, which is odd considering it's always closed. Gerard walks in and sees that the big window in the room was wide open.

Damn. what time is it? It's still dark out. He hears the grandfather clock in the hall ring twice.

What the hell? Why did mom wake me up at two in the fucking morning?

He turns toward Mikey's room. He hears soft sobs sort of blending with the soft pattering of the rain.

"Mikey?" he calls. No reply. He climbs out the window onto the old, upstairs deck and finds Mikey to the right of the window on the floor in the fetal position, sobbing. Gerard stood their for a second not knowing what to do. He picked his younger brother up and puts him on his bed.

"Why are you crying?" says Gerard, but to no avail, more sobbing and trembling.

Now Gerard wanted to know what the fuck was happening. He knew his brother wouldn't answer, but thought to try anyway. Gerard stands up and turns to leave. "Gee?" Mikey said almost inaudibly, still shaking. Gerard turns back and hugs him tightly, but not trying to suffocate him. This was how both of them communicated without words, simply a hug letting the other know that they are there and always will be. "You can tell me later," Gerard says calmly while turning Mikey's light off and turning to close the door. "everything will be fine, just go to sleep. Goodnight." Gerard could not shake the bad feeling he had.

The whole house was eerily silent, and Gerard hated it. He was still standing in the hallway between their rooms, looking towards the upstairs living room. There was only one light on and it was in the corner, flickering slightly as the rain got heavier. Gerard finally decided he should go downstairs to talk to his mom, at two in the fucking morning. The floor made these odd sounds while Gerard tried to quietly but quickly walk downstairs. When he got down to the last few steps, he sat down eavesdropping on his mom and step dad, who is Mikey's actual dad.

(Gerard's POV)

"What am I gonna tell him, Ryan? That I'm leaving because I can't handle this? Because I refuse to let them be abused by you?"