Webcam |royce|

Dark Requests C.{}{} 2

I couldn't help to cringe at the school couples getting off the bus. I mean as tough as I am, I still wanted that regardless. To be loved at this point by anyone. I felt almost too desperate that it didn't even matter if it was a guy. It was pathetic but I honestly didn't care. My insides felt gushy at the thought of someone loving me like that. I wouldn't need friends just that one person. I guess my life IS rather sad and in a strange way I've found comfort in being depressed. The task of feeling like utter shit is fairly easy so I just lied to myself saying it's okay.

I made my way to my house, came in and dropped my book bag at the front door.

Yanking off my polo sweater I let out a breathe of relief, "Home, sweet home."

I took off my school clothes and took a long hot shower in which I tried to plan my life out. Don't you hate how you always try to make future plans scrubbing your genitals? Sheesh, talk about the awkwardness of human tendencies. In the end of the shower I just pretty much figured I'd be doomed to go to Job-core to be a electrician or plumber.

I got out of the shower, brushed my teeth and grabbed some pjs and a t shirt to lounge around the house in. My mom wasn't home from work yet. She worked at some lame ass warehouse as a Supervisor for packing and shipping eye surgery tools. Some life she has, I thought to myself remembering how dark and grey that fucking building was on Take Your Child To Work Day. I threw the note she had in the trash can and took the twenty bucks she had sitting on the counter to order pizza. I stared out the window to be met with dark grey skies and rain. I hate living in Washington, it's so damn rainy and grey. I mean I'm not about to pull a Bella from Twilight and go on for forty days and forty nights but my Lord, she did have a point. What a depressing ass state, no wonder I'm so damn sad all day. God must really hate me to put me in this god forsaken state. White Jesus just refused to help me!

I cringed at the tears falling from my eyes quickly wiping them away. Slowly trudging to the living room, I decided to get on my laptop. A little tumblr will always make me feel better.

I logged in on my Toshiba and started scrolling down my Dashboard. There was beautiful pictures of oceans, forests, occasionally there would be just a random fashion photo of a really hot girl wearing something unique. There was nothing on this bitch today. Why is it that I can never have what I want? As I kept scrolling I noticed some depression blog posting pictures of teens cutting. I hate that shit. I mean I understand people are depressed but that shit is Hell nah! I tried to do it one time and...BRUH, that shit HURT! I'm just not about that life, I'll just stick to being grumpy and crying randomly thru out the day.....and thinking about my dead body at the bottom of my balcony because one day I had the balls to actually jump. Damn that's even worse than the cutting. Never mind. I mentally slapped myself and just decided to look for more happier things on Tumblr. Going to the search I looked up the hashtag humor.

Tumblr is always so damn funny.

-
-
-
Hours passed by of me being on this silly website. Honestly on a Friday night this is the best I could do? I sighed and kept scrolling when I realized something odd. People kept telling everyone to follow their Yahoo webcam chats, and even some people said theirs was private. Webcam? Yahoo? Why is this such a popular thing to do? My eyes shifted to the time, it's literally 10:33pm. I grabbed my Samsung Galaxy S4 and looked at my text messages. Where the hell is my mother? She said she was gonna stay at her new friends house. I smiled to myself then chuckled.

"At least someone's getting some around here." I muttered to myself.

"I'm fucking bored son." I admitted to myself taking another slice of pizza and stuffing my face with it. Maybe I should log onto Yahoo?......I rolled my eyes as I made a fucking account. Goddammit.