Delicate - eng version

Chocolate, Cupboards and Memories

I need to stop crying. Crying isn't going to solve anything. Then again, sitting in a broom cupboard eating my bodyweight in chocolate isn't going to solve anything either, but here I am anyway. They say chocolate and sex are on the same brain level for girls and that girls are supposed to get as much pleasure from chocolate as they do from sex. I can tell you, if I could go back to James' birthday party, I'd eat so much chocolate that I would just look pregnant, rather than actually having sex. Chocolate is much more pleasurable anyway. Chocolate doesn't knock you up and then go off with your cousin. Chocolate doesn't shoot you cheeky grins in the hallways because it knows you secretly like it. Chocolate doesn't judge you. It's just there for you when you need it, crying "eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeat me". And when you do, you don't have to feel guilty, because it's what the chocolate wanted.

What the hell am I even talking about?

Anyway, I've decided to hide out in this broom cupboard so I can have a think. What better place is there? Mum and Dad have gone home – well, Mum's gone to wherever she's staying in Hogsmeade and Dad's gone back home, I presume. I didn't say goodbye to them, I just peaked out of the broom cupboard (which is in the entrance hall) and I saw them leave. I don't know if I'm glad to see the back of them or if I want them to come back and sort out their problems. Or is it too late?

It's so annoying. I wish I knew what it was that caused them to go so psychotic the night before we came back to Hogwarts. It can't be my pregnancy alone. I mean, if it were, why did they both show up to the school? Oh I don't know, it's all so confusing. Maybe something happened – maybe Dad cheated on Mum! Maybe that's why she threw him out of the house. But Dad's not the cheating kind...is he? Anyway, who'd have him? Personally, I wonder how the hell Mum ended up with him. Don't get me wrong, I love my Dad (most of the time), but he's an overgrown kid. He's worse than Hugo most of the time! Mum's so methodical and mature all the time. They're complete opposites. It's a wonder they even survived nineteen years of marriage.

I don't know what to do. A year ago I never would have expected that I, Rose Weasley, complete nerd and prefect, would be facing issues like my parents divorcing or an unplanned pregnancy. I was so exam-orientated. My whole life was studying for the OWLs. But they came and went and then I found that I had nothing to do anymore. Of course there was always Quidditch, but even that gets boring after a while. Even boys didn't interest me – not really. I mean, there was Carl the Ravenclaw who broke up with me in front of the whole school, but I was more upset because of the humiliation rather than actually losing him. The only boy I ever really had eyes for was Teddy.

I need Teddy now more than ever...but he hates me just like Dad does. Why did I have to be so bloody childish about the engagement? I should be happy for Teddy and Victoire. He loves her so much – what guy wouldn't? She's even more beautiful than her Mum or Dom (both of whom are so stunning they make me look like a troll whenever I stand beside them). She has no flaws at all. Even Nana Molly and Grandad love her the most because she's their first grandchild. Nana and Grandad Granger don't favour me for being their first grandchild, which I find completely unfair.

"I don't want to hear it, Malfoy," I hear a voice hissing from outside the broom cupboard. I push open the door, only slightly, and peek out into the entrance hall. Dom and Malfoy are standing by the front doors of the castle. Dom's face is very red and she hasn't changed out of her Quidditch robes yet and Malfoy (also dressed in his Quidditch attire) looks just as pale as he did when I told him that I want to put our baby up for adoption.

"Dom, you have to believe me –"

"Why should I believe anything you say?" she shrieks, her voice echoing around the hall.

"I told you I'm sorry!" Malfoy says exasperatedly.

"Sorry?" she cries, "You're sorry? Don't you think "sorry" is a little bit trivial for this situation? You got my cousin – my best friend – pregnant! And you think that "sorry" is going to cover it? You're pathetic, Malfoy!"