What an amazing life I have! Being rushed into such situations unbeknownst to me, and yet
Here I am.
Standing here with this wonderful education which determines my value
I am only valuable by grades, by A's by "it is your only option!"
You are going to the most prestigious school in England!
You will be going1 You will be doing this and that, and the likes
Looking out for me, taking care of me, can't even piss straight, I get it
I don't know what I want as yet, and the only place which I will end up is the workplace slaving away to a miserable job from 9-5 which, as always,
Means you have succeeded.
I love you all, I love the fact that you have grown me, and are still making me into the young man which I hope to be,
But do I really want to go to college? Do I want to do what you THINK is good for me?
Must I be subject to the standards of how others see me,
And yet, I must listen and fit in? Conform? Am I not being obedient or being an A-student?
Is my worth determined by nothing else but standardized testing?
Is all I am worth nothing more, than a certificate and your pride?
Is my dream nothing but a fleeting thought which will pass, though I have been the one to completely forget it until now?
I have no say in my future? I have no say in what my life should be?
You should shape my life and I chart my path from where you put me?
I should find my own way, but after you throw me on it first?
Amazing, such joy I feel as I smashed that pen, such happiness,
Such amazement in my already planned life.
My own life is a test as it seems, as nothing else matters but grades, grades, grades, but what about learning?
How do I apply my knowledge without being told, "and they give marks based on how you allocate this?"
I should learn, but grades are the reason for me to be considered as learning?
I am smart yes, limitations exist, and yet you still love me no matter what happens?
No matter what you get, I will still love you. Oh yes, I too love that phrase
Because once I do not get what you expect, I never worked hard enough.
The trend continues, and so on and so on.
Where will this take you? You won't get far without something to drop back on,
Yet there is living proof that school and college won't matter if what you are taught isn't applied to assist in your learning. But what is learning, and what knowing to have learnt?
Have I been so foolish to ever think that I would only be as good as I can be if I did not fit in the system?
Making an impact, creating different modes in which I bring communities together, speaking on difficult topics, using my words in order to better both myself and others around me, having the strength to do what many cannot do
What am I to do? Am I to simply rely on what I have been told? The many different ways words are twisted to make your actions good for me?
I believe that whatever my mind is put to, I am able to become great enough and live out my dreams,
By saying you will love it if you try it does not justify the fact that I have never had any form of interest in it at all.
And yes, I am 16 already, which means my future should already be thought out, already be planned,
I must know what I want to be, I must know that whatever I do, I must always remember that there must be a backup in case I fail.
That simple statement alone, says a lot: If I fail, I give up and go to the one area which I have the most distaste for, but at least I have money, and I'm happy
That ever so simple statement, says that if my dream and goals fail, I should stay a failure and go back to the next best thing,
That statement, means only one thing, and one thing to me,
Nothing else matters.
