Upside down

Gloomy

I struggle every morning to get out of bed. But today was different, It was like a brick wall was built between my consciousness and unconsciousness. Nothing was going to wake me up today. Maybe tomorrow but definitely not today. I'm to sad.. I got a call at nearly 1 a.m. (mind you this was a school night) when I clearly wasn't sleeping because well.. Insomnia is my best friend. So me being logical and not rude like I am normally I answered the call after all the receiver was my best friend Max. I answered with a soft hello? Then at that moment my heart crumpled and fell out of my chest. His sister Gwen replied frantically sobbing "oh my fucking god- Sky you need to come to our house I need to talk to you it's about Max he isn't ok.." My first reaction was oh hell no. My second reaction was to reply with some smart ass reply but I decided to go with my third simple reaction which was to say oh- I'll be right there and hung up. Max's house is nearly 3 blocks away so I got it my beat up sliver Honda and sped away in the darkness. When I arrived the porch lights were on and the one light in the living room was dimmed and I could see a silhouette of a person pacing back and forth I assumed it was Gwen because I could see long strands of hair illuminate the person's figure. I proceeded to knock on the door my palms sweaty and my hands shaking. Gwen answered the door mascara crusted on her cheeks. For the first time in forever the air was still. It's never usually quite when I go to Wheeler's house its always you know.. warm. Then what felt like forever Gwen grabbed her limp arms around me in a weak bear hug as she sobbed. I asked "what's going on.?" She mumbled softly "he's in the hospital... Jen and Mike are with him. I don't think he'll make it.." It was silent again. "I figured I would tell you.." She said still sobbing. "You figured? Oh yea because I can just live without him." I vainly said "I'm sorry you know Gwen I'm so sorry I just-" then it was all tears from that point on. Gwen offered to drive me to the hospital and I obliged. The car ride was still and silent, not even her quirky taste in pop music was present to fill the silence. Once we went in the room I took one hard look at him, and broke into another series of sobs. His face was black and blue and the only thing keeping him from death, was a breathing tube. I knew even if he did survive he would never be the same.. After I mustered up the courage I walked towards him and squeezed his limp hand. I whispered "I-I love you max.. so much you have no idea.." Hot tears rolling down my face. " I don't know if you can hear me, but if you can thank you so much for saving me from the dark hole I was living in before I met you Max.. I love you." I finished. I couldn't physically stop sobbing. A nurse came soon after. " Are you Max's Girlfriend?" she asked. " y-yes." I fibbed I knew it was wrong but I couldn't help it. I needed to be considered family right now. "oh good Mrs Wheeler insisted I give you information on the car accident." The 10 minutes she explained to me about the accident I couldn't focus my mind was fuzzy. I was told he was hit by a drunk driver, that abruptly sped into an intersection t-boning Max. Due to the force of the driver's truck Max's vehicle went tumbling off the side of the road. The Nurse described it as a miracle he lived. I don't necessarily agree both Max and I knew that he would've liked to die instantly instead of suffering a long painful death. I lost my temper and stormed out of the room and flung myself on the hard waiting room chairs. Sobbing was the only thing I could do. The rest of the night was a blur. Jen came in tears explaining how Max didn't have much time left. There was nothing I could do to stop her from making a decision his life support was getting cut off.. I insisted for her to wait and see if he would wake up, but we both knew there wasn't any hope. I checked the time on my phone and the bright screen blared 3:30 a.m. I logically thought I should go home before my mother noticed I was gone and have a heart attack. I can't loose two people today.. I waited around for about 20 minutes until I heard frantic beeps of a machine coming from Max's room. I froze and held my face in my palms and cried until I couldn't breathe. I was a slobbery mess. I couldn't possibly drive home there was no way. I dialed my mom's number and waited for her to pick up. " Hey.." I started. " What the hell sky do you know what time it is where are you?" She replied. I weakly explained everything and pleaded for her to come pick me up and let me stay home. She gave in and we headed home. So that was my night and that is why I physically can not leave my bed today.