The Boy Who Left Us Broke

My Story of His Death

I was broke, just like everyone else. 

My greatest fear was being abandoned. 

So, the most meaningful moment for me was when I had more people there for me than just my family and Ben. My family and Ben were the only people I've trusted most of my life.

 At an early age I realized how much it hurt for the people you not only trusted the most but loved the most to leave. When they left, they not only hurt me, but they took parts of my trust and love with them.

 By the time I reached kindergarten I thought that the more people you trusted and loved the more hurt and broken you would get. I don't think I truly realized what I considered my unspoken law was more of a theory until this year a whole group of people I had only let in part-way, mostly because of Ben, were there for me during the worst time of most of our lives. 

Some of the people that were there for me I had not even considered cared that much about me until they were there when not only I needed them, but we needed each other.

My middle school is small, so is the county that I live in. It's a place where everyone knows everyone else, a place where we all have at least one memory together. 

Just imagine that, the togetherness and closeness between all of us, how everything you do is known by everyone at some point. Imagine walking through the doors of your school and everyone saying, "It was really cool that you shot that ten point on Saturday." when you hadn't eve told your best friend, not that you needed to. 

Every week it was always like this, everyone in my school talking about how "Daisy got her hair cut in Bath County, it looks great." or about how "Lane shot an eight point and then lost it, so he spent a whole hour tracking it down." But one week something happened that both nobody and everyone was talking about, that weekend a boy who went to our school died in his sleep. 

A boy we all knew and cared about, the 6th graders' classmate, the football players' teammate, most of ours' friend, and a boy who was something to all of us. Could you imagine walking in on that, based on the information I gave you? The truth is that you can't really prepare yourself for the impact of seeing everyone you know and care for so lost and distraught. 

Crying wasn't a strong enough word to describe what was happening. It was more like painful sobbing. Everyone was crying, even the teachers. 

I couldn't take it, I ended up running to the band room to get away. Shortly after all my girl friends followed me and we sat their sobbing and trying to get the others to laugh, though I was the only one who succeeded.

However, that wasn't the part of the week that amazed me the most. In homeroom we shared a moment of silence, although most of it was spent crying, my best friend Gavin and I were the only ones not crying. 

After the moment of silence, he came over and hugged me, "Are you okay?" He asked. "I don't know, best friend." I replied. 

We stood like that for a while before Ben came over and took Gavin's place. It was then the amazing part happened. "Make room!" Clayton yelled before joining the hug, then Gavin joined, and after him all the boys from our table joined, then the girls. 

Now it's tradition to hug throughout the day.

That week we formed bonds with each other that we'll have forever. It wasn't only the saddest week of my life, but the best because in one moment I realized that the people who truly love you will be there, and that even if they leave, they'll come back for you.

 In case you're wondering I'm not broke anymore, I'm on the mend and my worst fear is heights. 

Authors Note

So, this is how he left us,left me, feeling.

If you have any questions, just ask and ill answer them.