Mind the gap

It came flooding back

I was sharing the one and only day with my memories with the man that I loved . He pulled his sweatshirt out of the bag that I had brought and slipped it over my head. I was wrapped in his arms and his smell. As I lay my head down on his chest , he leans in and presses onto my lips firmly. This unforced kiss that spoke for words unspoken made me realize why my memories were lost to my own brain. I had a severe brain tumor that made my brain unable to correspond memories but my facial recognizing part of my brain was intact. That's why I didn't go to school I had to have to many brain scans, and Jonathan had to be connected to sensors to relay my brain waves into his brain.

"Happy anniversary ." He said

I had forgotten that the day that Darci had died was the day that I met and fell in love with Jonathan. The most amazing day in all of my history. He pulls over the bag , and you might think it's some chocolates. Well, is actually pictures of all the time that we have spent in the hospital and a letter.

"Hey beautiful,
So hears the monstrous place that our pieces of the puzzle bonded. You are so cute when you sleep. By now the memories must be flooding you. Well, the memories that were taken from you have been given back. I'm sorry if they feed you some artificial story for why your life is why it.
Love Jonathan "

"This is my last night with you. As fast as I leave you will be able to retrieve your memories." He said

"What? Why ? I love you. You can't go." I said

"I know but if I don't step out of your life you won't have a normal life ." He said

" I have never had a normal life! That's not what I want. I want this abstract thing I call life with you in it ." I said tears starting to fall

"I don't know how they put your life back into one piece but I don't think they can break what they put back together." He said holding me in allowing my tears to fall into his shirt

We just sat there until the fire burnt out and we just looked at the stars . Then he pick me up off the ground. It was part of our nightly ritual. He picked me off what ever surface I was sitting on, then he tucks me into my sleeping surface , then I would pretend to be asleep when my parents would come in and check on me, then I climb into his arms and fall into a peaceful slumber. But tonight I could just stay in his arms. He flopped down onto the air mattress and I lay down directly do my head lay on his heart and my entire body taking in his sent and his shape.

Later that night I screamed out in terror from my brain trying to take in all the memories of my childhood and teen years.

"It's okay. Just stay calm." He said as he wrapped his large arms around me. This is why I need him.

"This is why I need you." I said rubbing my face into shirt. He held onto me. "Why do you have to go if you want me to get better?"

"It is because I am part of the equation that helped your brain remain stable so that you didn't have to be locked up in some mental area of a hospital." He said looking down at me slight sitting up on to his elbows putting me of balance.

" Well , I want you to stay. I mean I already have most of my memories. I'm okay with the pain but I need you in my life. " I said about to cry.

He practically lifted me out of my body and into his as he said. "You really are ready to endure all this pain for me?"

"Yes." I said. He looked utterly surprised by my answer.

"Okay, then." He said lying back down.

I slid forward on his body and gave him a kiss that no words could ever explain and then fell back asleep in the position I was sleeping in.

The next morning I woke up with the sun. So did Jonathan. He started to deflate the air mattress as soon as we got of it. I started to pack up every thing that he had brought into the two camping bags.

"You want to go on a hike?" He said.

"Sounds enjoyable." I said slinging a pack onto my back and passed the other pack to Jonathan.

"Let's go." He said walking towards the mountain. I ran to catch up with him once I caught him , I grabbed his hand and held on. He squeezed my hand and said "You know that your parents might believe that this might not work?"

" Oh. Well, we will just make them believe that this is perfect." I said with a jolt of pride.